Category: Lifestyle

In a remarkable story that mirrors themes of simplicity and spiritual fulfillment, Ven Ajahn Siripanyo, the only son of Malaysian billionaire Ananda Krishnan, made a life-changing decision to renounce his claim to a $5 billion family empire in favor of embracing a monastic lifestyle. Ananda Krishnan, a leading figure in Malaysia’s business world, controls a vast empire that includes interests in telecommunications, satellites, oil, real estate, and media.

Who is Ven Ajahn Siripanyo?

Born into a life of privilege, Ven Ajahn Siripanyo made an extraordinary decision at the age of 18 to leave behind his luxurious upbringing and become a Buddhist monk. His choice, though unconventional, aligns with his father’s strong Buddhist faith. A report by the South China Morning Post states, “Ajahn Siripanyo’s choice was entirely his own, and it is respected within the family.”

Interestingly, Siripanyo’s mother, Momwajarongse Suprinda Chakraban, is descended from the Thai royal family, giving him both noble and wealthy lineage. Despite the immense material wealth available to him, Siripanyo’s spiritual journey began when he took a temporary retreat in Thailand, which eventually evolved into a lifelong dedication to the monastic life.

The Life of a Forest Monk

For over 20 years, Ven Ajahn Siripanyo has lived as a forest monk, primarily residing at the Dtao Dum Monastery, located near the Thailand-Myanmar border. He embraced the Buddhist principles of renouncing material possessions and living simply, relying on the kindness and generosity of others to meet his basic needs. His decision reflects the core Buddhist teachings of detachment and mindfulness.

While Siripanyo has committed himself to monastic life, he occasionally reconnects with his family, particularly his father. These brief visits are aligned with Buddhist teachings that emphasize the importance of family ties and maintaining relationships within the family while upholding spiritual values. His visits allow him to balance the monastic ideals with familial duties without forsaking his deeper spiritual commitment.

Embracing Global Perspectives

Raised in London alongside his two sisters, Siripanyo was exposed to diverse cultures and experiences. He completed his education in the UK, where he became fluent in at least eight languages. This broad cultural exposure significantly influenced his worldview, allowing him to integrate a deeper understanding of Buddhist teachings into his life and practice.

Ajahn Siripanyo’s path mirrors that of Julian Mantle, the fictional lawyer from the book The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari, a story about a successful lawyer who seeks spiritual enlightenment after abandoning his career. However, Siripanyo’s journey is unique because it is a rare, real-life instance of someone from such a wealthy and privileged background choosing a life of spiritual service and simplicity over material wealth.

A Unique Spiritual Journey

While many individuals born into wealth may find it difficult to abandon such luxuries, Ven Ajahn Siripanyo has chosen a different path, one that prioritizes spiritual enlightenment over the comforts of affluence. This decision to pursue a life dedicated to Buddhism is not simply a fleeting desire but a deep commitment to understanding the true meaning of life, transcending the pursuit of material success. The contrast between his upbringing and the life he now leads is a striking example of the personal sacrifices made in the quest for spiritual fulfillment.

The story of Ajahn Siripanyo also raises questions about the role of family expectations versus individual aspirations. His father, a business mogul with an expansive empire, likely had aspirations for his son to inherit and continue the family legacy. Yet, Ajahn Siripanyo’s personal decision to embrace Buddhism, which he describes as his calling, highlights the freedom to pursue one’s true path despite the external pressures of wealth and legacy.

Ven Ajahn Siripanyo’s renunciation of materialism is a testament to the profound influence of Buddhism in shaping an individual’s values and worldview. His decision demonstrates the potential for profound personal transformation, even for someone born into extreme wealth, and highlights the enduring power of spiritual practice.

In a world where materialism often dictates life choices, Ajahn Siripanyo’s journey serves as an inspiration for others seeking meaning beyond material wealth. His choice to become a forest monk has made him a living example of the Buddhist ideals of non-attachment, simplicity, and spiritual dedication.

Though his life as a monk is marked by simplicity and self-discipline, it also includes moments of connection with his family, which reflect the values of compassion and respect for one’s roots. This balance between his monastic life and his family ties shows that it is possible to live a life of spiritual fulfillment without completely severing connections to one’s past.

In conclusion, Ven Ajahn Siripanyo’s story stands out as an inspiring example of how spiritual fulfillment can be prioritized over wealth and worldly success. His choice to leave behind a life of luxury and embrace monastic life speaks to the power of Buddhism’s teachings, demonstrating that true wealth lies in spiritual growth and inner peace, not material possessions. His journey is a rare, real-life manifestation of the kind of transformation that many only dream of, and his life continues to serve as an example of the possibilities that open up when one chooses the path of simplicity and spiritual service.

Adultery is no longer a criminal offense in New York following Governor Kathy Hochul’s decision on Friday to repeal a law dating back to 1907.

The repealed statute in New York’s penal code stated, “A person is guilty of adultery when he engages in sexual intercourse with another person at a time when he has a living spouse, or the other person has a living spouse.” Previously classified as a Class B misdemeanor, this law could result in a jail sentence of up to three months.

The New York State Senate referred to the law as “outdated” in its rationale for removal. Assemblyman Charles Lavine, who authored the bill to repeal the law, highlighted its limited enforcement over the decades. According to Lavine, there were 13 recorded arrests and charges under this law, with five resulting in convictions. However, he acknowledged that these figures might not fully capture the scope of the law’s application, as some court records are not readily accessible.

The most recent known case involving this statute occurred in 2010 but was ultimately dismissed, underscoring the law’s diminishing relevance and application in modern times.

By signing the repeal, Governor Hochul has brought New York’s legal framework in line with contemporary views on personal relationships and privacy, marking the end of a statute that persisted for more than a century.

As parents, we dream of maintaining a close and trusting relationship with our children well into their adult years. However, some parenting habits, despite being well-intentioned, might inadvertently hinder the deep connection we aim to build.

Here are five common behaviors that may be creating distance between you and your kids—and how to change them for a lasting, meaningful bond.

1) Acting as a Dictator Instead of a Guide

When children are young, parents naturally assume the role of decision-makers and protectors. This approach ensures their safety and well-being during their formative years. However, as children grow, holding on to this “dictator” mindset can backfire.

Teens and young adults need space to develop their judgment and learn from their mistakes. Maintaining rigid control often leads to frustration and resentment, making it harder for children to open up or feel understood.

Transition to being a guide: share advice, set boundaries when necessary, but give them room to make decisions. This shift nurtures mutual respect, fosters independence, and builds trust—key ingredients for a strong parent-child relationship.

2) Being Overly Critical

It’s easy to view our children’s actions as a reflection of our own parenting, which can lead to being excessively critical. However, constant criticism can harm their self-esteem and create emotional distance.

Dr. Jeffrey Bernstein, a parenting psychologist, emphasizes that frequent criticism can cause children to feel “inadequate and unvalued.” Instead of focusing on their shortcomings, acknowledge their efforts and growth. Celebrate their individuality and provide guidance with empathy.

By supporting rather than judging, you cultivate a bond rooted in understanding and encouragement.

3) Pretending to Be All-Knowing

Parents often feel pressure to appear infallible to maintain authority. While this may provide young children with a sense of security, it can alienate older kids. Teens are quick to recognize that no one has all the answers and appreciate authenticity over perfection.

Dr. Brené Brown, a researcher on vulnerability, explains, “Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity.” Acknowledge when you don’t know something, and invite your children to figure it out together.

This openness fosters humility, trust, and a willingness to learn, making your child more likely to approach you during times of uncertainty.

4) Avoiding Tough Conversations

It’s tempting to shield children from difficult or uncomfortable topics, whether it’s about relationships, mental health, or past mistakes. However, avoiding these discussions can make them feel isolated or unsure of where to turn when facing their struggles.

Creating a safe, nonjudgmental space for open dialogue signals to your child that no topic is off-limits. These conversations, while challenging, are opportunities to build trust and demonstrate your unwavering support.

Even if the discussion isn’t perfect, your willingness to engage openly strengthens your bond.

5) Refusing to Admit When You’re Wrong

No parent is perfect, and mistakes are inevitable. Refusing to acknowledge these missteps can damage your credibility and hinder trust.

Admitting when you’re wrong and apologizing teaches your children humility and accountability. It shows them that making mistakes is part of life and that owning up to them is a sign of strength.

By modeling this behavior, you reinforce values of honesty and responsibility while strengthening the foundation of respect in your relationship.

Final Reflection: Parenting Is a Two-Way Journey

Building a meaningful bond with your children doesn’t require perfection—it requires presence, understanding, and authenticity. By letting go of habits that unintentionally create barriers, you pave the way for a relationship built on trust, respect, and connection.

Here’s to fostering a deeper, lasting bond with your kids as they grow!

As a relationship therapist, I’ve often heard couples lament, “We just can’t communicate.” Yet, deeper examination reveals it’s usually not a lack of communication but how they communicate that creates tension. Miscommunication often turns into a destructive cycle, fostering emotional distance and disconnection.

Take Jamie and Liz as an example. Jamie tended to bottle up frustrations until they became unmanageable. This often led to emotionally charged “We need to talk” moments where they unloaded grievances all at once. Liz, feeling ambushed, would react defensively and withdraw, leaving both partners feeling unheard and resentful. This cycle embodies what I term the “3-D Effect”—emotional Distance, constant Distraction, and a growing sense of Disconnection—a theme I explore in my book, Why Can’t You Read My Mind?

This dynamic is all too common. Whether you’re the partner who bottles up feelings or the one who reacts defensively, these patterns can strain even the strongest relationships. But the good news is that small, deliberate changes can transform conversations from hostile exchanges to meaningful connections.

Why “We Need to Talk” Backfires

The phrase “We need to talk” sets the stage for tension before the conversation even begins. It implies blame, often making the other person defensive before a word is exchanged.

Consider Marcus and Ellie, another couple. Marcus was frustrated with Ellie’s frequent phone use during dinner. Instead of calmly addressing his feelings, Marcus blurted out, “You’re always on that thing! Don’t you care about us?” Ellie, feeling attacked, retorted, “I’m busy with work—why don’t you get off my back?” Neither felt understood, and the issue remained unresolved.

This cycle of blame and defensiveness is common, but shifting how we approach such conversations can break the pattern and foster understanding.

Three Steps to Improve Communication

1. Begin with Connection, Not Criticism

Instead of starting with a complaint, open with empathy or a positive statement. For instance, Marcus could have said, “I love spending dinner time with you and feel disconnected when phones are out. Could we agree to keep them away during meals?”

Why it works: Starting on a positive note sets a collaborative tone. It signals that the goal is connection, not conflict, making the conversation less confrontational.

2. Own Your Feelings Without Blaming

Using “I” statements can help express emotions without making the other person feel attacked. For example, Jamie could have said, “I feel overwhelmed when I don’t share my feelings earlier. Can we make time to talk before things build up?”

Why it works: When you take ownership of your emotions, it reduces the likelihood of defensiveness from your partner. This keeps the conversation focused on resolving the issue rather than assigning blame.

3. Invite Solutions Instead of Dictating Them

Rather than pointing out the problem, shift toward brainstorming solutions together. Ellie could have responded to Marcus by saying, “I didn’t realize how important this was to you. Maybe we can have a no-phone rule for dinners?”

Why it works: Collaborative problem-solving fosters teamwork and mutual understanding, strengthening the relationship.

Practical Tips for Healthier Conversations

Choose the Right Time: Timing is critical. Avoid addressing sensitive topics when emotions are running high or distractions are present. A calm, private setting can help ensure the conversation is productive.

Practice Active Listening: Reflect on what your partner says to show you’re genuinely engaged. For example, Marcus could have responded, “So, you feel unheard when I check my phone at dinner. Is that right?” This simple act of listening can diffuse tension and foster connection.

Focus on the Future: Avoid rehashing past mistakes. Instead, direct the conversation toward solutions and moving forward together.

Changing the Script

If “We need to talk” has become a dreaded phrase in your relationship, it’s time to replace it with something more inviting. For example, saying, “Can we talk about something on my mind? I want us to feel closer,” shifts the tone and sets the stage for a more positive exchange.

Couples like Jamie and Liz or Marcus and Ellie don’t succeed because they avoid disagreements but because they learn to handle conflicts with respect, creativity, and care.

“Relationships flourish not when we avoid hard conversations but when we handle them with courage, kindness, and a willingness to truly hear each other.”

Next time you need to address a sensitive topic, rethink your approach. It’s not about avoiding tough conversations but about handling them with intentionality and compassion. A willingness to listen and connect can transform your relationship into one that thrives.

Life is a tapestry of highs and lows, a mixture of joyous celebrations and inevitable hardships. Along the way, people often encounter challenges that test their resolve, leading to one of life’s most perplexing questions: “Why do bad things happen to good people?” Yet, the reality is that adversity does not discriminate—difficulties arise in every life. While the reasons behind these struggles often remain elusive, they are an intrinsic part of the human experience.

The Certainty of Hard Times

From sudden illnesses and broken relationships to career setbacks, life’s trials can leave individuals feeling shaken and bewildered. In these moments, it’s common to seek explanations or assign blame, often turning inward with questions like, “What did I do to deserve this?”

While self-reflection and accountability are valuable, they do not always yield satisfying answers. As much as people strive to rationalize their pain, some experiences defy explanation. “Sometimes, there simply are no easy answers,” the article reminds us. Instead of dwelling on the “why,” a more productive approach is to accept that pain is an inevitable part of life.

Adopting a Growth-Oriented Perspective

One way to face adversity is by shifting focus from lamenting the situation to exploring the lessons it offers. A growth mindset enables individuals to reframe challenges as opportunities for self-improvement. Rather than succumbing to despair and asking, “Why me?”, one might instead consider, “What can I learn from this?”

A growth mindset transforms obstacles into stepping stones, fostering resilience and strength. Each hardship presents an opportunity to grow, equipping people with the tools to face future challenges. This approach instills a sense of purpose and optimism, helping individuals persevere even during their darkest hours.

Taking Control Amid Uncertainty

A crucial aspect of navigating life’s struggles lies in recognizing the difference between what can and cannot be controlled. Although external events often remain beyond one’s influence, personal reactions to those events are always within reach.

Consider the scenario of losing a job—a distressing and often unexpected occurrence. While the decision to downsize is out of an employee’s hands, their response can shape the outcome. They can either dwell on the loss or use it as an opportunity to reevaluate their goals, acquire new skills, and explore different career paths. The article underscores, “By focusing on our internal reactions and making conscious choices about how we respond to challenges, we empower ourselves to take charge of our own happiness.”

Building Resilience to Rebound

Resilience, the ability to recover from setbacks and adapt to change, is a cornerstone of personal growth. Those who cultivate resilience discover an inner strength that helps them face adversity with courage and determination.

Resilience is not about avoiding difficulties but learning to navigate them effectively. It involves believing in one’s capacity to overcome obstacles and focusing on small, actionable steps. Progress may be slow, but each step forward reinforces the idea that setbacks are temporary and surmountable.

The Role of Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence plays a pivotal role in managing life’s challenges. It encompasses the ability to recognize, understand, and regulate emotions—both one’s own and those of others. Mastering emotional intelligence enables individuals to respond to difficulties constructively rather than react impulsively.

Empathy and compassion are key components of emotional intelligence. Understanding that everyone endures hardships fosters a sense of shared humanity. By extending kindness to oneself and others, individuals create a supportive environment conducive to healing and growth.

Seeking Support: A Vital Step Forward

No one is immune to life’s difficulties, and seeking help is not a sign of weakness but of strength. Talking to trusted friends, family members, or professional counselors can provide valuable insights and a sense of relief. As the article emphasizes, “It takes courage to reach out to others, but it can make a significant difference in your ability to cope with challenges and move forward.”

Sharing burdens not only lightens the load but also opens the door to new perspectives and potential solutions. Support systems play an essential role in helping individuals navigate tough times.

Creating a Meaningful Life

Despite its ups and downs, life offers countless opportunities to find beauty and fulfillment. By adopting a growth mindset, focusing on controllable factors, building resilience, honing emotional intelligence, and seeking support when needed, individuals can rise above adversity and forge a meaningful path forward.

“Remember, don’t give up,” the article concludes. Even in moments of despair, hope persists, and solutions exist. With determination and a positive outlook, no obstacle is insurmountable. Life’s challenges, though daunting, ultimately shape individuals into stronger, more compassionate versions of themselves.

John and Julie Gottman, renowned for their groundbreaking work in couple’s psychology, have spent decades studying how conflict shapes relationships. Their research offers invaluable insights into how couples can not only survive disagreements but use them to strengthen their bond. Through their work, they’ve created strategies and laws for relationships that are built on the foundation of understanding, empathy, and communication.

John and Julie Gottman have been married for over 35 years, and their partnership has proven instrumental in their research into why some couples thrive, while others fall apart. Their journey began in 1986 when John, alongside a colleague, established a laboratory at the University of Washington to study couples. Soon after, Julie joined the team, and together they named their project the “Love Lab.” The Gottmans wanted to answer a fundamental question: Could they predict the future of relationships?

“We wanted to see whether we could predict the future of relationships,” John Gottman says, explaining the origin of their research.

Their methodology was unique. Couples were invited into the lab, where they would sit across from each other and discuss unresolved issues. These conversations were not only recorded but also monitored for physiological reactions, such as heart rate, blood velocity, and skin conductance. Through these readings, they could assess how stress and emotional reactions were influencing the conversation.

“Couples would come into the lab, sit down, typically facing one another, and we would ask them to think about a problem that they hadn’t solved yet that they wanted to talk about,” Julie Gottman recalls. The couple’s body language, tone of voice, and facial expressions were all analyzed to gain a deeper understanding of how conflict affected their relationship dynamics.

John Gottman elaborates on the physiological monitoring: “We measured things like skin conductance, sweating from the palms of the hands, respiration, and a variety of other signals, and they were synchronized to the video time code.” By meticulously analyzing these metrics, the Gottmans discovered patterns in how couples reacted to stress and disagreement.

The Gottmans’ research demonstrated that when individuals became upset during a conversation, their physiological responses—such as an elevated heart rate (typically over 100 beats per minute) and shallow breathing—indicated a state of emotional flooding. In these instances, they found that the ability to listen and engage in productive problem-solving decreased dramatically.

“What we discovered from the physiological research is that people who stonewalled tended to be what we call flooded, which actually means in fight or flight,” Julie Gottman explains. This emotional flooding, John Gottman adds, triggers the release of stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline, impairing one’s ability to process information. “When you’re flooded, you really feel like you’re in danger of dying. You feel so threatened by your partner that you start to really secrete these stress hormones,” he says. The result is often a breakdown in communication, with partners repeating themselves and becoming increasingly frustrated.

The Gottmans discovered that the key to navigating conflict was not avoiding it, but managing it effectively. Their research led to the identification of what they call the “Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse”—four behaviors that, if present during an argument, significantly increase the likelihood of relationship dissolution. These are criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling.

Julie Gottman explains the first horseman: “The first one was criticism—blaming a problem on a personality flaw of your partner. For example, ‘Oh, my God, this place is such a mess. Why are you such a slob?’” The second horseman, contempt, is even more damaging, as it involves superiority, sarcasm, and scorn. “Contempt is like criticism, but it has a dash of superiority,” John Gottman adds. Defensiveness, the third horseman, is when one partner adopts a victim mentality, refusing to take responsibility or listen to the other person’s perspective. “That’s the most common one,” Julie Gottman says. Finally, stonewalling occurs when one partner shuts down completely, refusing to engage with the other.

To combat these destructive behaviors, the Gottmans emphasize the importance of taking breaks during heated conversations. “As soon as you recognize there’s flooding in the room, you say, ‘I think we need to take a break,’” Julie Gottman advises. This allows both partners time to calm down and return to the conversation with a clearer mind. “On the break, you distract yourself by reading, by listening to music, maybe watching TV. So your body has a chance to calm down,” she suggests. When both partners reconvene, they often approach the issue with a renewed sense of understanding.

The Gottmans’ latest book, Fight Right: How Successful Couples Turn Conflict Into Connection, outlines strategies for managing conflict in a way that builds rather than undermines the relationship. One of the exercises they discuss is the “dream-within-conflict” technique, which helps couples understand the underlying dreams and values driving their disagreements.

Julie Gottman gives an example from their work with couples: “We had a woman who was adamantly opposed to getting a dog, but her partner was all for it. They decided to try the dreams-within-conflict conversation.” This exercise helps partners move beyond their positions and explore the deeper emotional needs behind them. When one partner explained that not having a dog meant they could travel freely, the other partner revealed that they saw having a dog as a practice run for raising a family. This deeper understanding allowed them to find common ground.

“Beneath the surface, it was about leading a life of adventure and travel versus staying home and raising a family,” John Gottman notes.

However, not all conflicts can be resolved through understanding. The Gottmans acknowledge that some issues may be deal-breakers, where no amount of compromise or understanding can bridge the gap. John Gottman points out that certain life dreams, such as whether or not to have children or where to live, can be incompatible, leading to a breakup.

“Sometimes one person’s dream is the other person’s nightmare, and they cannot reach a compromise, but at least they know why they’re breaking up,” he explains.

Julie Gottman adds, “Another one that I’ve seen is geography. I treated a couple where one partner lived in Uganda and the other in Switzerland. They loved each other but couldn’t make their future come true.”

Despite these challenges, the Gottmans believe that fighting right can lead to a stronger, longer-lasting relationship. John Gottman concludes, “The payoff is that we can have a lifelong love. Research has shown that when you can do that, you actually live an average of 15 to 17 years longer. You’re healthier, and your kids turn out better.”

Julie Gottman reflects on the deeper nature of love that can emerge when couples work through their conflicts. “What I’ve seen in doing couples therapy for 30 years now is a different kind of love. It’s much more profound,” she says. “Once you’ve seen one person in their fullness, including the cracks, you tend to be more forgiving, I think, of other people.”

The Gottmans’ research and methods offer a path for couples not just to survive conflict but to use it as a foundation for growth, understanding, and connection.

As she approached her 50th birthday, Debra Whitman, a specialist on aging, found herself pondering questions about the future. Despite her extensive work in public policy, she couldn’t locate a comprehensive guide for navigating life beyond midlife, similar to guides that prepare people for parenthood. “There was really nothing out there about this second half of life,” said Whitman, now 54 and an executive at AARP as well as a former staff director for the US Senate Special Committee on Aging.

Despite significant advancements in life expectancy, with the population of centenarians in the United States projected to quadruple over the next 30 years, Whitman noted a lack of resources for those wanting to live purposefully into older age. Motivated by this gap, she decided to author The Second Fifty: Answers to the 7 Big Questions of Midlife and Beyond, aiming to shed light on aging’s unique challenges and opportunities.

In an interview just shy of her own 50th birthday, a CNN journalist spoke with Whitman about practical steps for a healthier, more contented second half of life.

When Do Adults Experience Peak Happiness?

Addressing common questions about happiness, Whitman revealed that contentment tends to increase with age. “Personal happiness increases with age,” she said, referencing an AARP survey that found people are generally less happy in their 40s and 50s, but levels of happiness rise dramatically by their 70s. Whitman shared, “By the time we’re in our 70s, that’s when we are happiest. We found that 91% of people over age 70 are happy.” Even among those aged 50 and above, 90% remain optimistic about their future, suggesting that life satisfaction improves with maturity.

Whitman attributes this to greater appreciation for life, improved emotional control, and a positive outlook, even as health issues may become more common. Many older adults, even into their 80s and 90s, still view themselves as healthy despite physical limitations.

Addressing Cognitive Decline

One of the most prominent concerns about aging is the fear of cognitive decline. Whitman noted that “about half of Americans think they’re going to get dementia,” yet only 15% of people, even those in their 70s, experience mild cognitive impairment. She explained that the notion of inevitable memory loss is a misconception.

For those wanting to reduce the risk of dementia, Whitman suggests five essential habits: regular exercise, a balanced diet, maintaining a healthy weight, avoiding smoking, and limiting alcohol intake. Following even one of these habits can extend life expectancy by two years, while practicing all five can add 14 years for women and 12 for men. “Those healthy habits also help our brain health, too,” Whitman said, adding that just a few of these lifestyle changes could reduce dementia risk by up to a third.

Learning From Other Cultures

Whitman’s research also led her to study aging in different cultures. While many countries face similar demographic shifts, she observed that some, like Singapore, proactively address aging by fostering a lifelong culture of learning and engagement. Singapore’s Silver Academies, designed to keep older adults mentally sharp, offer both educational and job-training programs, encouraging active aging.

In New Zealand, Whitman encountered the Kiwi Coffin Club, an initiative sparked by Maori elder Katie Williams. When Williams suggested a class on coffin decoration, she realized that many shared her interest. The club now serves as both a social and support group, where members decorate coffins with personal symbols, from favorite hikes to beloved themes like Elvis. The club even provides coffins for low-income families and customizes coffins for young children. Whitman found it inspiring to see older adults connecting over meaningful projects and giving back to their communities, illustrating a unique approach to both life and death.

The Importance of Community in Aging

Whitman emphasized that having strong social connections is crucial for healthy aging. “Being socially isolated is the equivalent of smoking 15 cigarettes a day,” she explained, adding that isolation can reduce life expectancy by as much as 15 years. Citing Dr. Robert Waldinger, leader of the long-running Harvard Study of Adult Development, Whitman shared that adults who enjoy fulfilling relationships and robust community ties tend to be healthier well into their 80s.

Cultivating a Positive Mindset on Aging

Whitman believes that mindset plays an essential role in the aging process. “If you think that aging is a positive time of life…you live seven and a half years longer,” she said. A positive perspective not only promotes longevity but also reduces risks for strokes, heart attacks, and even dementia. Whitman noted that a constructive outlook on aging can enhance physical and mental health by fostering a sense of purpose and resilience.

Challenging Misconceptions About Advance Directives

Discussing end-of-life preferences, Whitman explained how she had originally planned to advise people to set advance medical directives. However, Dr. Diane Meier, a pioneer in palliative care, offered a different view. Meier pointed out that advance directives might not always reflect a person’s current wishes and can sometimes be limiting. During the COVID-19 pandemic, many individuals chose not to go on ventilators, not realizing they could recover and be removed from ventilators once they improved. Meier advocates for designating a trusted individual to make medical decisions on one’s behalf rather than rigidly outlining preferences in advance.

Whitman now encourages open, ongoing conversations with loved ones to ensure that decisions align with one’s evolving needs and values. She highlighted that as people age, their views on end-of-life care often shift, so these conversations should continue throughout life to accommodate changes.

Preparing for Life’s Physical and Financial Realities

The journey through later life brings various practical needs, from vision and dental care to long-term health services. Whitman pointed out that these needs can be both anticipated and managed with appropriate planning. “There are a lot of holes that we can fall into across our second 50 years,” she said, stressing that preparation can significantly ease the aging experience. Acknowledging the needs of an aging population at a national level is also essential to support the wellbeing of older citizens, Whitman argued.

Making Time for Connection and Gratitude

Reflecting on her own life, Whitman shared that writing her book inspired her to prioritize relationships. With her children now in college, she focuses on maintaining close ties with family and friends. “I think carrying a sense of gratitude through my life as well is really important,” she said, highlighting that nurturing personal bonds and values plays a vital role in ensuring a fulfilling “second 50.”

Whitman’s advice underscores a proactive approach to aging: adopting healthy habits, fostering social connections, cultivating positivity, and preparing for future needs. She believes that both individuals and society must take steps to address aging, ensuring that everyone can enjoy a longer, healthier, and more satisfying life. Through her work, Whitman hopes to guide others in embracing the opportunities that come with growing older.

The search for youthfulness is timeless, yet it’s less about finding a magical elixir and more about adopting a few transformative habits. Implementing these habits daily can make you look and feel younger within just two months. The goal isn’t to hide age but to embrace it with grace, confidence, and health.

This approach doesn’t involve drastic changes or pricey treatments. Rather, these simple, everyday actions can brighten your appearance and improve your overall confidence.

Here are nine habits that can make a noticeable difference in your appearance, giving you a vibrant glow within 60 days.

1. Hydrate Continuously

Drinking water seems basic, but it’s a powerful step toward youthful skin. Many overlook the importance of hydration, yet it helps maintain skin’s plumpness, smooths wrinkles, and supports a natural glow. Staying hydrated also helps detoxify the body, which is essential for a refreshed appearance.

Think about it—when dehydrated, skin becomes dull, dark circles form, and wrinkles become more pronounced. Make it a habit to drink at least eight glasses of water a day. Though it might seem like a lot initially, it will soon feel natural, and you’ll wonder how you ever managed without it.

2. Wear Sunscreen Daily

Sunscreen isn’t just for beach days; it’s essential year-round. Many, like the author, regret not adopting this habit earlier. “I thought sunscreen was only necessary when heading to the beach or spending a significant amount of time directly in the sun. Boy, was I wrong.” UV rays can damage the skin anytime they reach us, even through clouds or cool temperatures, causing wrinkles, dark spots, and other signs of aging.

Now, sunscreen is as essential as brushing teeth every morning, applied rain or shine. Using a moisturizer with SPF 30 or more has made a noticeable difference, leading to an even skin tone, improved texture, and fewer fine lines around the eyes and mouth.

3. Get Sufficient Sleep

Adequate sleep is fundamental for youthfulness, as it’s not just a recharge for the body but also for the skin. During sleep, the body repairs daily damage and gets ready for the next day. Chronic sleep deprivation, however, accelerates aging, leading to dull skin, dark circles, and fine lines.

While asleep, collagen production increases significantly, which is crucial for skin elasticity. When well-rested, the skin looks brighter, healthier, and rejuvenated.

4. Exercise Regularly

Exercise benefits the body and mind, but it also contributes to radiant, youthful skin. Physical activity boosts blood flow to the skin, bringing in oxygen and nutrients that are key to skin health. It also promotes collagen production, resulting in firmer, younger-looking skin.

Sweating during exercise helps flush out toxins from the body, preventing clogged pores and skin issues. Any exercise—from brisk walks and yoga sessions to intense high-intensity workouts—can be beneficial for the skin.

5. Eat a Colorful Diet

Diet plays a significant role in skin health. Consuming excessive processed foods, sugars, and unhealthy fats can cause breakouts, dullness, and speed up the aging process. On the other hand, a diet rich in fruits and vegetables, packed with antioxidants, can have the opposite effect.

For instance, red bell peppers are rich in anti-aging antioxidants, while papaya is loaded with vitamins, minerals, and antioxidants that improve skin elasticity and reduce fine lines. Aim to “eat the rainbow” by including various colorful fruits and vegetables in daily meals, which will not only make you look younger but also improve overall health.

6. Practice Mindfulness

Stress affects more than just the mind; it also has a visible impact on the skin. When stressed, the body releases cortisol, which can cause acne, wrinkles, and skin conditions like rosacea. Practicing mindfulness can be a powerful way to mitigate these effects.

Yoga, meditation, or simply deep breathing can reduce stress, fostering a youthful appearance. “Beauty truly does come from within,” notes the author. Taking care of the inner self allows the outer self to reflect that well-being.

7. Quit Smoking

The author recounts their experience with smoking and its toll on the skin: “I used to be a smoker, and I can tell you firsthand about the damage it does to your skin.” Smoking restricts blood flow to the skin, depriving it of oxygen and nutrients. Additionally, the chemicals in tobacco harm collagen and elastin, essential proteins for firm and elastic skin.

After quitting, the author noticed improved skin health, a brighter complexion, and fewer lines around the mouth. This visible transformation demonstrates the skin’s capacity to heal when spared the damage caused by smoking.

8. Drink Alcohol in Moderation

Alcohol has a dehydrating effect that leaves skin looking dry and dull. It also triggers inflammation, which can cause skin sagging and wrinkles over time. While occasional drinks are fine, reducing alcohol intake is better for the skin’s appearance.

Consider substituting a nightly drink with a hydrating herbal tea a few times a week. This switch not only aids hydration but also improves sleep quality, which benefits skin health overall.

9. Appreciate and Care for Your Skin

Finally, one of the most important aspects of youthful skin is self-love. The author emphasizes the need to treat skin gently, nourishing it and embracing its unique qualities. Lines and wrinkles reflect a life lived fully, and they can be worn proudly while still caring for the skin.

Beauty emanates from within, and self-love amplifies this beyond physical appearance. True beauty lies in acceptance and mindful care, which shine through to the outside.

Balancing Act for Overall Well-Being

Each of these habits contributes to a balanced lifestyle that enhances not only appearance but also overall well-being. “The beautiful thing about these habits is that they all feed into one another,” the author observes. A good night’s sleep can reduce stress, a balanced diet complements exercise, and all of these promote healthier, more youthful-looking skin.

Consistency is the key to transforming these habits into a routine that naturally yields lasting results. Just as true beauty comes from within, so does the resilience and radiance achieved through daily dedication to self-care.

As the annual time shift approaches, most parts of the United States and Canada are gearing up to return to standard time, with clocks scheduled to move back an hour early on Sunday morning. The transition officially happens at 2 a.m., when clocks are set back to 1 a.m. This shift grants an extra hour of sleep for many, while overnight workers experience an additional hour in their shifts. The return to standard time means earlier sunrises, but also earlier sunsets, ushering in the shortest days of the year over the next six weeks.

For many people, automated and electronic devices, like smartphones and computers, will adjust to the new time on their own. However, time will still need to be manually changed on some appliances, such as older microwaves, stoves, and certain car clocks. A few may relate to the sentiment of a writer who noted, “I still haven’t fixed my stove, which has been blinking an incorrect time since a power outage back in July, so that ship has sailed.”

The History of Daylight Saving Time

The concept of daylight saving time dates back to 1784, when Benjamin Franklin, in a lighthearted jest, suggested the practice. In a satirical letter to the editor of the Journal of Paris, Franklin humorously calculated how much Parisians could save on candles if they adjusted their schedules during the winter.

Germany became the first country to officially implement daylight saving time in 1916, followed by the United States in 1918. Initially, it was met with resistance from farmers, who found the change inconvenient as it limited the morning hours available to harvest and prepare goods for market openings.

Although the concept had been introduced, a nationwide daylight saving time law didn’t go into effect in the U.S. until 1966. Before that, during the 1940s and ’50s, local governments were free to set their own schedules, leading to widespread confusion, particularly in the transportation sector. In response, the Uniform Time Act of 1966 established consistent dates for daylight saving time across the country, while allowing states to opt out as long as their choice was uniform statewide. Interestingly, the U.S. Department of Transportation was assigned the task of enforcing this legislation to ensure consistent timekeeping.

Today, most states observe daylight saving time and participate in the annual “fall back” on the first Sunday in November. However, there are exceptions. Arizona, Hawaii, and U.S. territories like American Samoa, Guam, the Northern Mariana Islands, Puerto Rico, and the U.S. Virgin Islands all opt out. Arizona’s time practice is especially unique. While the state largely observes standard time year-round, the Navajo Nation, which covers a significant portion of Arizona, still participates in the daylight saving time change.

The Debate: Should We Stop Changing Clocks?

The tradition of changing clocks twice a year has long sparked debate, with many Americans expressing a preference to end the practice. There have been multiple attempts in Congress to make daylight saving time permanent, but most efforts have stalled.

Additionally, there is a regional push to adopt a different time zone for certain areas in the Northeast. In states like Rhode Island, Connecticut, and parts of Massachusetts, many advocate for a move to Atlantic Standard Time. This shift would mean cities such as Boston and Providence would share the same time zone as Nova Scotia, potentially eliminating early winter sunsets before 4:30 p.m. “Boston’s earliest sunsets happen at 4:11 p.m. during the first week in December, even though sunrises creep before 7 a.m.,” according to proponents of this proposal, which gained some traction in 2016.

However, for those in northern regions like Utqiagvik, Alaska, the impact of daylight saving time is minimal. In Utqiagvik, the northernmost town in the United States, the sun sets for a period lasting 62 days, and no time change can alter that.

What is the essence of human happiness? It’s a question that has intrigued humanity for centuries. Ron Gutman, a Stanford adjunct professor, serial entrepreneur, author, speaker, and award-winning inventor, has dedicated a significant portion of his career to understanding it. Known for his widely viewed TED Talk from 2011, *”The Hidden Power of Smiling,”* Gutman took his research to the next level with a trip to Bhutan in October 2024, hoping to uncover insights on happiness from the South Asian kingdom where well-being is prioritized over economic growth.

Journeying Through Bhutan

In October, Gutman embarked on a three-week exploration of Bhutan, a country often called the Kingdom of Bhutan, nestled in the eastern Himalayas. Accompanied by academics, clergy, and local guides, Gutman trekked across the country’s rugged landscape, absorbing the Bhutanese way of life and their understanding of happiness. Bhutan is notable for its focus on “Gross National Happiness,” a concept coined in the 1970s by Bhutan’s fourth king, Jigme Singye Wangchuck. The king asserted, “Gross National Happiness is more important than Gross Domestic Product,” as quoted in a recent OECD report. This philosophy of prioritizing collective happiness and well-being over economic advancement distinguishes Bhutan on the world stage.

“Going deep into understanding happiness led me to researching Bhutan, because they put an emphasis on this,” Gutman explained in an interview with CNBC Make It. He added, “It made me want to understand it from their vantage point, right? So, [I wanted] to go and listen to them, to the people that have been getting this knowledge, from generation to generation for many [years].”

Most of Gutman’s journey was a physically demanding climb through Bhutan’s high-altitude terrain, traveling mostly on foot or by local means. The elevation ranged from around 1,000 feet to nearly 14,000 feet, offering him ample opportunity to immerse himself in Bhutan’s serene and awe-inspiring natural environment.

Bhutan’s Unique Connection to Nature

Environmental sustainability is deeply embedded in Bhutan’s national identity. The country is the world’s first “carbon-negative” nation, a status helped by its extensive forests, which cover over 70% of the country. A 2023 report highlights how this dedication to conservation has shaped Bhutan’s policies and practices. Gutman observed, “They’re very mindful of nature, very protective of nature… It’s sacred for them. You can’t cut a tree without getting a very special permit.”

For many Bhutanese, the bond with nature is more profound than simple respect; it is foundational to their identity. Gutman noted how locals perceive their lives as not merely connected to nature but as emanating from it. This deeply ingrained belief reflects Bhutan’s commitment to safeguarding its natural environment as a crucial component of its philosophy on happiness and well-being.

The Key to Happiness: Simplicity

So, what is the key to happiness? For Gutman, the answer lies in simplicity. He discovered during his time in Bhutan that happiness is closely tied to mindfulness, which can often be found through a connection with nature. Gutman observed, “The more I progress in the research of happiness, the more I personally understand it better, the more I connect it to mindfulness.”

He realized, by observing Bhutanese people and conversing with local religious figures, that happiness is rooted in mindfulness. In his view, modern culture often fosters a fixation on external stimuli, which can become overwhelming. “In modern culture, we’re very concentrated on what’s happening outside. There’s a lot of stimulus that is coming at us …. At some point, we become almost prisoners of that,” he said. In contrast, nature, Gutman reflected, has a calming effect: “Nature creates the exact opposite …. Nature is just there, it just happens.”

Gutman describes this discovery as a revelation about the “empty self.” Just as nature exists in a state of tranquility, so too can human consciousness, he argues. Whether resting beside a secluded lake or hurrying through a bustling city, Gutman believes that our consciousness remains inherently calm and unchanged. He remarked, “We basically choose to get stressed by all these sensory emotions… [because] actually, the inside of us is calm and empty, right? Nature helps see that and understand that.”

Bhutan’s Challenges

However, despite its strengths, Bhutan faces numerous challenges. Only recently did Bhutan leave the UN’s Least Developed Countries category in December. The nation’s GDP per capita was approximately $3,700 in 2022, according to World Bank figures. “We look at it as maybe poverty — low GDP,” Gutman explained. Yet, he was struck by the happiness he observed among Bhutanese citizens, despite their relative lack of material wealth. “It’s not an easy life because these are not wealthy people, but they’re happy,” he said.

The Bhutanese government has been actively working to improve the economy while maintaining its values of environmental sustainability and Gross National Happiness. Policies like a daily tourism fee are one way Bhutan tries to uphold its guiding principles. Gutman believes that Bhutan’s balance between progress and tradition exemplifies a unique approach to growth. “It’s a country that demonstrates how you can innovate without forgetting the ancient wisdom that has supported them for centuries,” he said.

Lessons from Bhutan’s Approach

Gutman’s experience in Bhutan highlighted for him the importance of balancing innovation with tradition. Many developed nations, he observed, often prioritize rapid development and constant change, leaving behind some foundational values. He explained, “When we rush towards the innovation, the new thing, doing things faster, better, easier, cheaper … The thing is, we forget to take with us this very solid foundation that keeps the core very strong. So we’re building a little bit on water.”

According to Gutman, the Bhutanese model shows that slower progress, grounded in strong ethics and mindfulness, can create a more resilient society. He pointed out, “And I think what Bhutanese are doing really well … is keeping that strong core of beliefs, of morals, of ethics, of mindfulness as the foundation of how they make progress. So progress is, sure, slower, but more solid, right? And, I think that’s something to learn from them.”

Conclusion: A Path to Inner Calm

Through his journey, Gutman gained valuable insights on the simplicity of happiness. In Bhutan, he encountered a culture that values mindfulness, a connection with nature, and a slower, more deliberate approach to progress. Gutman left with a sense of admiration for Bhutan’s commitment to preserving its environment, traditions, and focus on Gross National Happiness, offering the world a unique perspective on well-being that contrasts sharply with many developed nations.

In an era dominated by a relentless drive for economic advancement, Gutman’s experience in Bhutan serves as a reminder that happiness might not come from pursuing more but rather from embracing less. The “empty self” and the simplicity found in nature and mindfulness, Gutman argues, could offer a more profound understanding of happiness for those willing to look inward instead of outward.

Bhutan, widely recognized as one of the happiest nations globally, is embarking on a transformative project with the potential to set new standards in sustainable living. This ambitious venture, known as the “Mindfulness City,” is underway in Gelephu, a Special Administrative Region (SAR) in Bhutan. Spanning over 2,500 square kilometers, the region will function as a semi-autonomous zone, equipped with its own government, legal system, and judiciary, establishing it as an independent entity within Bhutan.

The project’s distinctiveness lies not just in its size but in its commitment to sustainability and harmonious living with nature. Gelephu Mindfulness City will incorporate two protected ecological zones: a national park and a wildlife sanctuary. These areas will house a network of rivers with renewable energy capacity, projected to generate between 4,000 and 5,000 megawatts of electricity. Additionally, the city will feature agricultural zones, small towns, extensive forests, and diverse wildlife, aligning with Bhutan’s dedication to environmental conservation and sustainable practices.

Bhutan’s King Jigme Khesar Namgyel Wangchuck conceived this “Mindfulness City” to elevate the nation’s growth while preserving its values and resources. The king envisions a place where individuals from various backgrounds can live together in harmony with nature, fostering a multicultural yet ecologically focused society. Prime Minister Tshering Tobgay spoke at the NDTV World Summit in New Delhi, describing the project as “Gross National Happiness 2.0.” He shared, “This is what we call ‘Gross National Happiness 2.0,'” highlighting the city’s goal to enhance the well-being of Bhutanese people through a refined model of sustainable and mindful urban living.

Significantly, Gelephu is strategically situated near Bhutan’s border with Assam, India. The prime minister noted that the location choice is intended to strengthen ties with India, emphasizing that the city will “directly benefit India” in numerous ways. This proximity to India underscores Bhutan’s commitment to collaboration with its neighboring country. The Bhutanese Prime Minister added, “The King had one word for why Gelephu: ‘India’,” illustrating the visionary outlook for integrating Bhutan and India’s futures.

The choice of Gelephu, a biologically rich and pristine area, was not arbitrary. Initially, Prime Minister Tobgay questioned why the project wasn’t placed in Bhutan’s existing infrastructure hubs like Thimphu or Paro, where airports and highways already exist. In response, the king conveyed that Bhutan’s future is inseparably linked with India, explaining, “If we chose any other place, then such a project may succeed, it may have its challenges, but if we plan this along the border with India, the concept itself will drive it to success.” This statement underscores Bhutan’s strategy to develop a collaborative, cross-border vision with India through this groundbreaking city.

Once realized, the Mindfulness City will occupy nearly 2.5% of Bhutan’s total landmass, an area more expansive than the entire nation of Singapore. Comparatively, it will dwarf Bhutan’s capital, Thimphu, which spans just 26 square kilometers, in contrast to Gelephu’s impressive 2,500 square kilometers. The city’s blueprint involves a series of “inhabitable bridges” that will link different areas, fostering a sense of interconnectedness across the region’s natural rivers and streams.

The architectural layout of Gelephu Mindfulness City aims for a low-rise skyline, emphasizing harmony with the surrounding landscape. The city will feature amenities typically found in modern urban centers, including a university, healthcare facilities offering both Western and traditional treatments, markets, and spiritual centers. The development will also see the construction of hydroelectric power plants and hydroponic greenhouses, further supporting Bhutan’s environmentally-conscious objectives.

The city will be divided into 11 key neighborhoods, spanning 35 rivers and streams, designed as mandalas with central public spaces, reinforcing the focus on community and inclusiveness. This design mirrors Bhutan’s Gross National Happiness (GNH) philosophy, where personal well-being, community spirit, and environmental preservation outweigh mere economic considerations. This philosophy has garnered global recognition for its emphasis on a holistic approach to progress, prioritizing the quality of life over GDP growth alone. The kingdom has expressed that the city will prioritize “not just economic development, but personal well-being,” aiming to set a precedent for future urban planning worldwide.

Construction on an international airport in Gelephu has already commenced, setting the stage for the city’s integration into the global network while preserving its unique mindfulness-oriented character. The city aims to redefine modern living, demonstrating how future cities might function in balance with the environment while achieving a high standard of living and well-being for their residents.

Relationships may seem well-adjusted from the outside; you and your partner manage daily responsibilities, communicate smoothly, and rarely clash. Friends and family may even see you as an ideal couple, united and reliable. However, beneath this polished exterior, you might be dealing with an underlying, disheartening void—a feeling that something essential is missing. Conversations might feel shallow, intimacy could seem routine, and the bond you once had may feel more like a faded memory than a current reality.

If you’ve ever wondered whether you’re just “going through the motions” or acting out roles rather than truly connecting, it’s possible that you’re in a functional but loveless relationship. Identifying signs of such a relationship can help you decide whether to reignite the emotional spark or explore alternative options. Here are five signs that may indicate you’re in a functional but emotionally lacking relationship.

1. Conversations Are Only About Practical Matters, Not Personal Connections

A telltale sign of a functional relationship is the dominance of surface-level communication. Conversations typically revolve around daily logistics: coordinating schedules, managing household chores, or discussing finances. While these exchanges are vital for household management, they don’t nurture emotional closeness or deepen the relationship.

In a relationship rooted in emotional closeness, partners discuss more than logistics. They feel comfortable sharing their dreams, insecurities, and deeper thoughts, creating a genuine intimacy. As researcher Michael Kardas of Northwestern University’s Kellogg School of Management points out, meaningful conversations with others can provide unexpected joy and fulfillment.

When conversations with your partner rarely touch on personal topics, and a once-deep connection feels distant, it could be an indication that the relationship has transitioned from emotionally fulfilling to merely functional.

2. Emotional Support Is Lacking, Only Coexistence Remains

One of the hallmarks of a healthy, loving relationship is the presence of mutual emotional support. Partners in such relationships offer each other reassurance, listen attentively to concerns, and respond with empathy. This emotional bond creates a sense of security, allowing each person to feel they have someone to rely on during difficult times.

However, in a functional but loveless relationship, emotional support may be missing. Attempts to share personal challenges might be met with indifference or minimal interest, prompting you to seek support from friends or family instead. This absence of emotional responsiveness can make you feel like you’re merely coexisting rather than connecting, which diminishes the relationship’s sense of vitality and partnership.

3. Physical Affection Feels Obligatory Rather Than Genuine

Physical affection—including hugs, kisses, cuddling, and intimacy—is fundamental to romantic relationships. Studies show that these physical gestures can enhance emotional closeness, passion, and even mental well-being. In a loving relationship, affectionate actions feel genuine and contribute to a profound connection between partners.

In a relationship lacking love, physical affection may still occur, but it often feels forced or transactional. Intimate moments may lack the emotional depth they once had, leading to feelings of detachment or dissatisfaction. When affection feels like a routine task rather than a sincere expression of love, it’s a sign that the relationship has lost its emotional resonance.

4. Avoidance of Issues Due to a “Fine” Status Quo

In many emotionally detached relationships, partners avoid addressing underlying issues because everything appears to be “fine” on the surface. This tendency often stems from a desire to keep the peace; partners may believe it’s unnecessary to “rock the boat” if no visible problems exist.

However, ignoring deeper issues only widens the emotional gap over time. Studies have shown that repressing emotions can lead to poor communication and weakened connections. In a loving relationship, there’s usually a willingness to confront and work through difficulties. Avoiding such discussions to maintain a superficial harmony can signal a lack of emotional foundation necessary for navigating conflicts and growing together as a couple.

5. You Feel Alone, Even When Together

Perhaps the most poignant sign of a functional yet emotionally empty relationship is a sense of isolation that persists even in your partner’s presence. You may share meals, participate in activities, or manage household responsibilities together, yet feel emotionally distanced and lonely. This disheartening experience highlights the absence of true companionship in the relationship.

In their book Addressing Loneliness: Coping, Prevention and Clinical Interventions, the authors state that when a relationship doesn’t provide emotional security, it can lead to an overwhelming sense of loneliness. Without emotional intimacy, partners may withdraw, leading to a profound sense of solitude. If you often feel alone, even with your partner nearby, it’s time to evaluate whether the relationship can be revitalized or if a different path would be more fulfilling.

What Can You Do?

Realizing you’re in a functional but emotionally disconnected relationship is challenging, but it’s also a crucial first step toward meaningful change. If you relate to these signs, it doesn’t mean the relationship is beyond repair.

Many couples go through periods where emotional intimacy takes a backseat to daily responsibilities. To address the emotional disconnection, consider these steps:

1. Initiate Open and Honest Conversations: Begin by expressing your feelings openly. Avoid blaming or judging your partner, and focus on communicating your own experiences and needs. Using “I” statements can help create a non-accusatory, respectful environment.

2. Dedicate Time for Deeper Discussions: Set aside regular time for open conversations, perhaps through weekly “check-ins,” where both partners have the opportunity to share their thoughts and emotions without interruption.

3. Consider Therapy: Seeking the guidance of a professional, either individually or as a couple, can be extremely beneficial. Therapists can help you navigate these feelings, break down communication barriers, and develop strategies to rebuild emotional intimacy.

These proactive steps may help you determine whether the relationship can be rekindled or if it’s best to move forward in a new direction. Reconnecting emotionally takes effort, but it’s possible if both partners are willing to work on their bond and prioritize each other’s needs.

By recognizing the signs of a functional but emotionally distant relationship and taking steps to address the underlying issues, you may be able to reignite the emotional spark or make an informed decision about your future.

Warren Buffett, a man with a net worth of $142 billion, offers invaluable advice not only on how to make smart business decisions but also on how to lead a fulfilling life. His fortune, amassed over decades, has only grown more impressive as he has donated approximately $56 billion to various charities. As the saying by Jim Rohn goes, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with,” Buffett underscores that whom you choose to spend your time with is critical—especially your spouse.

In Buffett’s words:

“You want to associate with people who are the kind of person you’d like to be. You’ll move in that direction. And the most important person by far in that respect is your spouse.”

Buffett strongly believes that marrying the right person will make an enormous difference in one’s life. “I can’t overemphasize how important that is. Marry the right person. I’m serious about that. It will make more difference in your life,” he emphasizes.

Studies back up Buffett’s perspective. A 2021 report from the U.S. Census Bureau reveals that married individuals tend to earn considerably more than their unmarried counterparts, and their net worth is often three times greater. Additionally, the Bureau of Labor Statistics found that married couples spend around $10,000 less per person annually than unmarried individuals.

Beyond financial implications, the choice of a life partner plays a significant role in professional success. Research from Washington University in St. Louis, which has been previously discussed, shows that people with reliable and prudent partners perform better at work, receive more promotions, earn higher salaries, and are generally more satisfied with their careers. This effect is attributed to what the researchers term “partner conscientiousness,” which positively influences job satisfaction, income, and career advancement. The study notes that conscientious partners tend to manage more household tasks, exhibit pragmatic behaviors, and contribute to a more satisfying home environment. This, in turn, allows both partners to focus more effectively on their professional lives.

Buffett’s views, echoed by Rohn’s saying, highlight the influence of those closest to us. Good habits are contagious. If one partner is organized and efficient, the other partner benefits by being able to focus more on work. Furthermore, if the less organized partner adopts these traits, both partners can more effectively manage their business and personal lives, potentially leading to greater wealth accumulation.

However, while marriage may lead to financial prosperity, it doesn’t necessarily guarantee better health. A study published in the Journal of Physical Activity and Health found that individuals in romantic relationships tend to exercise less than their single counterparts. The study notes that moderate to vigorous physical activities, like running or lifting weights, are less common among those in relationships. The researchers found that people in romantic relationships are more likely to engage in activities such as eating or watching TV together, rather than exercising. As they put it, “For those with a partner, current (exercise) levels are substantially lower when the partner is present than when the partner is absent.”

This finding reveals that people in relationships tend to engage in less physical activity when they spend time together. In short, the presence of a partner can significantly reduce the likelihood of exercising, as couples often prioritize spending time together over physical activity.

Another study, published in Health Psychology, found that individuals in stable relationships tend to gain more weight over time, beyond what can be attributed to natural aging. Similarly, research in Social Science & Medicine indicates that people in long-term relationships are more likely to gain weight and less likely to engage in physical activity. Interestingly, the study also points out that when relationships end, individuals tend to lose weight and increase their exercise levels.

These studies suggest that individuals in secure relationships may become less focused on their physical appearance, as they feel less pressure to maintain healthy habits like eating well and exercising regularly. This behavior, while understandable, can lead to a decline in physical health.

On the other hand, maintaining a healthy lifestyle — which includes regular exercise — can have profound benefits, both physically and mentally. Research published in the Journal of Comparative Physiology shows that increased blood flow during exercise improves brain plasticity, which enhances cognitive functions. Additionally, a study in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Science found that exercise can increase the size of the hippocampus, which helps mitigate age-related memory loss, even in individuals in their 60s and 70s.

Moreover, a study from the University of Vermont discovered that moderate aerobic exercise can improve mood for up to 12 hours. Similarly, research published in the International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health found that regular exercise is associated with greater life satisfaction and overall happiness. People who engaged in higher levels of physical activity reported significantly higher happiness compared to those who exercised less.

While it’s clear that exercise has immense benefits, choosing a life partner solely based on their lifestyle habits may not be the best approach. As the Washington University researchers suggest, marrying a conscientious partner might sound like a path to a rigid and unexciting life. However, having a partner who is both conscientious and practical, as well as one who values a healthy lifestyle, can lead to a more successful career and a longer, healthier life.

So, what’s the best course of action? Instead of trying to change your partner’s habits, focus on how you can be more supportive. You could take the lead in managing household finances, performing more household chores, or handling maintenance and schedules. After all, the most effective way to inspire change is by leading through example.

You could also prioritize exercising together or making healthier eating habits a shared goal. Even if you and your partner don’t do the same workout, being in the same space while exercising can help both of you stay on track. My wife and I work out together often; we may not do the same activities, but being in the same room helps us both remain committed to our fitness goals. Implicit peer pressure can go a long way in maintaining good habits, and it still feels like we’re spending time together.

Ultimately, marrying the right person plays a significant role in leading a successful and fulfilling life, but equally important is being the right person. By being supportive, encouraging, and setting a good example, you can strengthen your relationship in both practical and emotional ways.

Traditional wisdom suggests that once you’re married, merging your finances is the logical next step in building a life together. This idea has been promoted for years, with the belief that sharing bank accounts strengthens trust and simplifies financial management. However, Kevin O’Leary, a star of Shark Tank, offers a different perspective, arguing that financial independence is a crucial element in a successful relationship.

O’Leary’s advice stands in stark contrast to the age-old idea of joint financial accounts. He firmly believes that no matter how in love you are, keeping your finances separate is essential. According to him, love and trust should not overshadow the importance of maintaining individual financial independence, which he sees as the foundation of a strong relationship.

“What I tell everybody to do in a relationship is: Have your own account, your own credit card — never merge your finances together,” O’Leary said during an interview with Fox News, a clip of which he later shared on Instagram. He emphasized, “I don’t care how in love you are, you keep your account to yourself.”

While this approach might resonate with some, not everyone agrees with O’Leary’s advice. A recent study published in the Journal of Consumer Research found that couples who merge their finances may actually experience a stronger relationship over time. The study suggests that sharing financial responsibilities can foster trust and improve relationship satisfaction in the long run.

So, the real question becomes: Is it better to maintain financial independence or to merge finances as a show of trust and unity? Finding the right balance between the two approaches is key, especially since it involves both emotional and financial stakes.

Finding the Right Approach

Deciding whether or not to merge finances after marriage is not an easy decision, and what works for one couple might not work for another. Many couples decide to pool their money, believing that sharing accounts simplifies access to funds and streamlines managing household expenses. Splitting bills, rent, or grocery costs can become more convenient with joint accounts. However, this convenience comes with its own set of challenges.

O’Leary’s perspective sheds light on the importance of maintaining credit independence within a marriage. Building and maintaining a strong credit history is crucial for long-term financial success. In situations where one partner manages most of the financial responsibilities, the other may struggle to establish their own credit profile. Joint accounts also come with shared liabilities, meaning both partners’ credit scores can be affected if one racks up debt or misses payments.

“If your marriage ends, you may suddenly find yourself among the 26 million adults in the U.S. who are classified as ‘credit invisible,’” O’Leary warns. Credit invisibility refers to individuals who lack enough credit history for lenders to assess their financial reliability. Without a separate financial identity, securing basic financial tools like mortgages or credit cards can become a significant challenge after a separation.

Maintaining individual financial profiles can help ensure that even if a relationship ends, each partner’s creditworthiness remains intact. Lenders rely on credit scores to determine eligibility for loans, mortgages, and credit cards. Without a solid financial history, it becomes more difficult to access these essential financial resources.

O’Leary also emphasized this point, stating, “After you get divorced, if you have been merged in with your significant other, you’re a nobody in our system.”

The Risks of Financial Infidelity

While credit and financial independence are important, they aren’t the only factors to consider in managing finances within a relationship. Having separate bank accounts can, in some cases, encourage secrecy and dishonesty between partners, a phenomenon known as financial infidelity.

According to recent data from Experian, about 27% of young adults (aged 18 to 35) admit to lying to their partners about their financial situation. This dishonesty can take various forms, such as hiding purchases, underreporting debts, or maintaining secret bank accounts. Even more striking, nearly one in five young adults said they don’t trust their partner enough to open a joint account.

The study from the Journal of Consumer Research highlights a different perspective. Couples who merge their finances may foster greater trust in their relationship. Sharing accounts means both partners can see how the other handles money, which can increase transparency and reduce the likelihood of financial secrets. It also encourages a shared sense of responsibility toward financial goals.

For couples who decide to merge their finances, this shared responsibility can serve as a foundation for building a secure financial future together. As O’Leary suggests, there’s more than love on the line when it comes to managing money. Your financial future and independence are equally at stake. However, shared finances may provide a unique opportunity to build trust, reinforce partnership, and avoid the pitfalls of financial infidelity.

Weighing the Pros and Cons

The decision to merge finances or keep them separate depends on a variety of factors, including individual preferences, financial habits, and the level of trust in a relationship. Some couples find that joint accounts simplify their lives, enabling them to manage household expenses with greater ease. In contrast, others prefer to maintain their independence, ensuring that their financial standing remains intact regardless of the relationship’s outcome.

O’Leary’s advice — to keep your money separate and maintain financial independence — comes from a place of caution. He highlights the importance of protecting yourself from the financial risks that may arise if a relationship fails. By keeping separate accounts, individuals maintain their financial identity and ensure that their creditworthiness remains secure.

On the other hand, merging finances can strengthen a relationship by building trust, transparency, and a sense of shared responsibility. As the *Journal of Consumer Research* study suggests, couples who share financial responsibilities may actually enjoy a stronger bond and greater relationship satisfaction over time.

For those who decide to merge finances, communication and transparency are key. Couples should discuss their financial habits, goals, and expectations early on to avoid misunderstandings and potential conflicts. Creating a joint financial plan that accommodates both partners’ needs and concerns can help ensure that both parties feel secure in their financial future.

Ultimately, there is no one-size-fits-all approach to managing finances in a relationship. Whether you choose to merge your accounts or keep them separate, the most important factor is finding a balance that works for you and your partner. As O’Leary emphasizes, love is important, but financial independence is crucial to maintaining a solid foundation in any relationship.

The key takeaway? Whether you’re a fan of merging finances or prefer to keep things separate, it’s essential to communicate openly with your partner and make a plan that works for both of you. Financial independence may provide security, but sharing financial responsibilities can foster trust — both of which are critical to a successful relationship.

Singapore, a small city-state in Southeast Asia, has experienced a dramatic rise in life expectancy over the last few decades. In 1960, a child born in the country could expect to live only to around 65 years old. However, today, a newborn in Singapore can anticipate living more than 86 years. The number of centenarians has also doubled between 2010 and 2020. This significant increase in lifespan can be attributed largely to government policies and investments aimed at improving public health and quality of life.

Singapore’s rise in longevity has earned it the distinction of becoming the world’s sixth “Blue Zone” in August 2023. Blue Zones are areas identified by National Geographic journalist Dan Buettner where people tend to live longer and healthier lives due to a mix of lifestyle, culture, diet, and community support. While some researchers have questioned the accuracy of these zones, they remain a symbol of places that offer insights into healthy living. Singapore, however, stands out among Blue Zones for a unique reason: its increase in longevity has more to do with forward-thinking policies rather than longstanding cultural traditions that define other Blue Zones, such as Ikaria in Greece or Nicoya in Costa Rica.

Singapore’s inclusion as a “Blue Zone 2.0” marks a departure from the typical Blue Zone regions. Buettner himself emphasized that Singapore’s achievements reflect proactive planning, rather than traditions that have persisted over centuries. While Singapore’s improvements in life expectancy are notable, the quality of life has also risen, making it an attractive place to live not only for its residents but also for those considering moving there for a healthier, longer life.

The Evolution of Health Policies

Residents of Singapore have witnessed a slow but steady evolution in the country’s policies that aim to enhance their health and wellness. Firdaus Syazwani, a local resident and author of the financial advice blog Dollar Bureau, shared his experience. “Having grown up here, I’ve seen firsthand the transformation in community health consciousness,” he explained. One of the more noticeable changes is the government’s imposition of heavy taxes on cigarettes and alcohol. In addition, public smoking bans have improved the overall environment, making public spaces cleaner and more welcoming. “No more second-hand smoke!” Syazwani added.

He was, however, surprised by Singapore’s designation as a Blue Zone, citing the high levels of sugar, salt, and coconut milk in traditional Singaporean dishes. Despite this, government policies are pushing for healthier eating habits. “Given our local cuisine’s penchant for richer ingredients, the Health Promotion Board has initiatives to encourage healthier dietary choices among residents,” Syazwani noted. For instance, mandatory nutritional labeling and efforts to reduce sugar content in drinks are making a difference in how people approach food choices. Although the effectiveness of these initiatives is still uncertain, he admits that such labeling influences his own choices, especially when it comes to sugary beverages.

Singapore’s healthcare system has also received global recognition for its efficiency and quality. The 2023 Legatum Prosperity Index ranked Singapore as the best in the world for healthcare. Citizens enjoy universal healthcare coverage, yet the system also incorporates private services and savings plans to help manage out-of-pocket expenses. This ensures that healthcare is both accessible and affordable, contributing to the longevity of the population.

Green Spaces and Public Well-Being

While healthcare policies play an essential role, other factors contribute to Singaporeans living longer, healthier lives. A well-developed public transportation system promotes daily exercise by encouraging walking. The government’s emphasis on keeping the country clean, green, and beautiful further enhances public health and mental well-being.

Charu Kokate, a senior partner at Safdie Architects and a long-time Singapore resident, highlighted how the country’s green spaces contribute to the quality of life. “Government initiatives that prioritize the seamless integration of parks, gardens, and nature reserves into the cityscape have earned [Singapore] the reputation of being a ‘garden city’,” she explained. She is impressed by the Urban Redevelopment Authority’s approach to city planning, noting that sustainability, efficient land use, and the incorporation of green spaces are central to their efforts. Kokate pointed out that while Singapore’s laws can be strict, they have resulted in a clean and well-maintained environment.

Among her favorite places in the city is the Singapore Botanic Gardens, a UNESCO World Heritage site known for its beautiful orchid collection and commitment to plant research and conservation. The gardens, located in the city center, offer residents and visitors alike a peaceful escape into nature. “It’s a haven for nature lovers, families, and tourists seeking peace and beauty,” Kokate added.

Public parks also serve as gathering spots for the community, which is another important factor in longevity. Longevity researchers agree that having a strong sense of community is essential to living a long, healthy life. Syazwani commented on the accessibility of public spaces: “From young adults to seniors, you’ll find a wide demographic engaged in regular exercise, facilitated by extensive public parks, fitness corners, and gym classes.” For those considering moving to Singapore, he recommended East Coast Park, which offers picnic spots and a serene environment for walking along the beach.

High Quality of Life, But High Cost

Despite its many advantages, living in Singapore comes with a cost. The country is ranked as one of the most expensive cities in the world. In Mercer’s 2023 ranking of costliest places to live, Singapore was listed second, just after Hong Kong. Although it can be expensive, many residents feel that the high quality of life justifies the expense.

Singapore is also a highly diverse country, with people from across the world calling it home. Despite its multicultural population, the government places a strong emphasis on maintaining social cohesion through strict laws and regulations. For example, littering, smoking in public places, drug use, and even jaywalking are met with severe penalties. Although the rules are stringent, many residents appreciate the order and safety they bring to everyday life.

Kokate noted, “The government’s policies are carefully aligned with the needs of the population, focusing on improving the overall quality of life, supporting economic stability, and maintaining social harmony.” She added that Singapore’s political stability also encourages business investment and economic growth, which benefits the country as a whole.

The city-state is not just known for its strict regulations; it also celebrates its rich diversity through its world-renowned food scene and vibrant cultural festivals. Singapore’s multicultural society embraces a wide range of traditions, from Chinese New Year to Deepavali, as well as international events like the Singapore International Festival of the Arts.

As Kokate summed up, “The city has something for everyone, regardless of age. The multicultural society embraces a wide range of traditions, creating a rich and vibrant cultural experience that enhances the stay for both visitors and expats.”

Many people struggle with the question of whether to eat before or after exercising. It’s a common dilemma: should you fuel up with food before a workout or wait until after to eat? The answer depends on several factors, including the type of exercise, the time of day, and your individual health goals. Unfortunately, research on this topic is still evolving, leaving people with more questions than clear guidelines.

Health experts agree that both pre- and post-workout nutrition play essential roles in maximizing performance and recovery, but timing and content can vary depending on personal needs.

What to Eat and When

Health professionals suggest eating before and after workouts, but for different reasons. For most individuals, a balanced meal with carbohydrates and protein, consumed two to four hours before exercise, provides enough energy to fuel the session. This also allows adequate time for digestion, minimizing the risk of nausea, acid reflux, or other digestive issues, explained Dr. Martha Gulati, a cardiologist at Cedars-Sinai in Los Angeles. She emphasizes that lifestyle changes, including proper nutrition, can significantly enhance exercise outcomes.

When there’s time before a workout, a nutritious pre-exercise meal might include high-quality protein such as chicken, salmon, or tofu, complex carbohydrates like oatmeal, sweet potatoes, or brown rice, and healthy fats from sources like avocado, nuts, or eggs, according to Dr. Cecilia Cordova Vallejos, a sports medicine physiatrist at Johns Hopkins Medicine. These food combinations provide long-lasting energy for workouts.

If you’re pressed for time and need a quick snack 30 minutes before exercise, that’s also an option. A small snack can be particularly helpful during longer, high-intensity workouts. Dr. Cordova Vallejos suggests a protein bar or energy gel, which are easy to digest, while Dr. Gulati recommends something as simple as a banana or a piece of fruit.

After a workout, replenishing your body is essential, especially for muscle repair. The International Society of Sports Nutrition recommends consuming 20 to 40 grams of protein within two hours of exercise to promote muscle recovery and growth. Foods like a can of tuna, a chicken breast, or three scrambled eggs with cheese offer protein amounts within this recommended range.

Tailoring Meal Timing to Specific Goals

Your meal schedule can also depend on your overall health and fitness goals. For instance, if you have diabetes or another condition that requires careful blood sugar management, the timing of meals around workouts becomes more specific.

Jill Kanaley, a professor of nutrition and exercise physiology at the University of Missouri, notes that people with Type 2 diabetes might benefit from eating breakfast before their morning exercise. A 2017 study of 64 adults with Type 2 diabetes in India found that those who ate breakfast before exercising had better blood sugar control compared to those who worked out on an empty stomach.

For those with Type 1 diabetes, the advice might be different. Dr. Kanaley pointed out that some research suggests fasting before moderate or high-intensity morning exercise can be safe for people with Type 1 diabetes, depending on their blood glucose levels upon waking. However, it’s important to consult a healthcare professional for personalized advice.

Generally speaking, exercising on an empty stomach isn’t always advisable. In a 2020 online survey of about 2,000 endurance athletes, many participants reported that working out without eating first hindered their training, reduced their performance, and made them feel hungrier afterward.

If building muscle and improving recovery are top priorities, Dr. Cordova Vallejos advises eating more protein and distributing it throughout the day. This approach can enhance muscle growth and reduce post-workout soreness.

People with food allergies, dietary restrictions, or specific medical conditions should seek advice from a physician, sports medicine expert, or nutritionist to develop a plan that aligns with their needs and goals.

The Bottom Line

Ultimately, there is no one-size-fits-all approach to meal timing around workouts. It’s essential to listen to your body and adapt based on what works best for you. Dr. Gulati emphasizes the importance of trial and error, suggesting that if a high-fat or protein-rich snack upsets your stomach before a workout, switching to a carb-heavy snack may be the solution. On the other hand, for low-intensity exercises like yoga or walking, you may not need to eat beforehand.

Dr. Gulati also reminds us that while there isn’t a “perfect” formula, you can develop a successful routine through patience and experimentation. She said, “Everyone has different needs, goals, diets, and schedules,” but over time, you’ll figure out what makes you feel your best during and after workouts.

While general recommendations can guide you, the most effective approach to timing your meals with exercise will depend on personal factors such as your health, type of workout, and how your body responds to different foods.

When faced with a complex issue at work, you might sit at your desk, stressing over the solution. After ten minutes of intense focus, you still come up blank. What should you do? If you were Steve Jobs, the answer was simple: get up and take a walk.

“Taking a long walk was his preferred way to have a serious conversation,” writes Jobs’ biographer, Walter Isaacson. Legendary designer Jony Ives also recalls, “So much of our time together was spent quietly walking.” It’s evident from various accounts that Jobs spent much of his time walking barefoot, whether he was deep in thought or discussing business strategies.

Jobs’ habit of walking wasn’t just about enjoying the outdoors or staying physically fit. He had an intuitive understanding of something science is now beginning to prove — walking helps the brain function more efficiently. Specifically, it aids in solving complex problems that often seem impossible to crack while sitting still.

As neuroscience suggests, walking shifts the brain into a mode that allows for creativity and problem-solving, which is why modern experts recommend adopting the “10-minute rule”: If you haven’t found a solution within ten minutes of focused thinking, take a walk.

Your Brain Isn’t a Muscle

This advice comes from Mithu Storoni, a neuroscientist from the University of Cambridge and author of the book *Hyperefficient: Optimize Your Brain to Transform the Way You Work*. On a recent HBR IdeaCast podcast, Storoni shared several strategies for improving brain efficiency, one of which is the 10-minute rule.

“I have some clients, and… one managing director has adopted a rule of, if he’s sitting in front of his computer with a problem that he hasn’t managed to solve for 10 minutes, he leaves his desk, he goes for a walk,” says Storoni.

She explains that unlike muscles, the brain doesn’t respond to more effort in the same way. If you’re doing a physically repetitive task, like working on an assembly line, pushing your muscles harder can yield more results until they tire out. But when the brain is your main tool, simply trying harder often leads to diminishing returns.

For tasks that are routine and don’t require much creativity, such as going through emails, focused effort works well. You can sit down, concentrate, and power through. However, when the job requires generating new ideas or solving a tricky problem, you need a more relaxed, open mental state where your mind can explore possibilities and make connections that weren’t immediately obvious.

Sitting in frustration for long periods doesn’t produce these “aha!” moments. Instead, trying to force ideas leads to mental exhaustion, blocking the creative process. Storoni emphasizes that instead of brute-forcing your way through a mental block, it’s better to coax your brain into a state that fosters innovative thinking.

Why the 10-Minute Rule Enhances Brain Function

So, how does stepping away from a problem after 10 minutes and taking a walk help your brain reach the right state to solve it?

According to Storoni, how you move your body affects how your mind functions. Taking a walk keeps your mind alert, but not fixated on one particular idea. “It keeps you in the right alert mental state, so you don’t just drift off, you don’t just fall asleep, or feel lethargic, or [look] at your phone,” she says. At the same time, walking keeps your attention moving because your surroundings are in motion. This constant yet gentle shift in focus allows your mind to wander, encouraging it to explore different solutions to the problem you’re working on.

Walking, she explains, prevents you from becoming overly focused on any one thought. “You can’t ruminate, because your attention can’t stick to one problem for too long because you also have to pay attention to where you’re walking,” Storoni adds.

In simple terms, as you walk, you have to navigate the physical world around you, avoiding obstacles like streetlights or uneven sidewalks. This physical movement mirrors a similar mental process where your mind lightly skips between ideas without getting stuck. It’s this fluid mental state that allows new ideas to form and breakthrough solutions to emerge.

The Power of Walking: Supported by Great Thinkers

If you’re wondering whether this technique is truly effective, consider the achievements of Steve Jobs. His creative genius and problem-solving abilities are legendary, and he regularly used walking as a tool to enhance his thinking. But Jobs isn’t the only one who relied on walking to sharpen his mind. Many other influential figures, from Charles Darwin to Mark Zuckerberg, have also advocated for walking as a way to unlock creativity and innovation.

The connection between walking and cognitive function is backed by both anecdotal evidence and scientific research. According to various studies, moving your body not only improves physical health but also boosts brain activity, particularly when it comes to tackling complex problems. When you feel stuck, continuing to sit and struggle at your desk may only deepen your frustration. But by getting up and taking a walk, you shift your brain into a more conducive state for creative thinking.

Applying the 10-Minute Rule to Your Own Life

The science and real-life examples are clear: if you’re stuck on a problem and haven’t made progress after 10 minutes, it’s time to get moving. This doesn’t mean giving up or abandoning the task; rather, it’s about shifting how you approach the challenge. Walking provides a change of environment and pace, which nudges your brain into a mode better suited for idea generation.

If you’re still skeptical, give it a try next time you encounter a mental block. Set a timer for 10 minutes of focused work. When the timer goes off and you haven’t cracked the problem, stand up, go for a brief walk, and allow your mind to wander. You may find that when you return to your desk, the solution you were struggling to find comes to you naturally.

Ultimately, the 10-minute rule isn’t just a technique for clearing mental roadblocks — it’s a philosophy that acknowledges the importance of working smarter, not harder. Whether you’re in the midst of a high-stakes project or trying to think creatively about a new initiative, taking a break after 10 minutes of frustration might be the key to unlocking your next big idea.

Shoshana Ungerleider, an internal medicine doctor, believes that to live a truly meaningful and fulfilling life, one must come to terms with the fact that life inevitably ends. Over her years caring for patients in the hospital, she has observed several common regrets people express near the end of their lives, as she shared with CNBC Make It.

“Being close to the end of your life really allows you — pushes you — to be present because that’s all you have,” Ungerleider, 44, remarked. She is the host of the forthcoming “Before We Go” podcast and the founder of the nonprofit End Well Foundation. “That is true for all of us. Throughout our lives, this present moment is all we have.”

As a physician who specializes in end-of-life care, Ungerleider has noticed that many of her patients express certain recurring regrets as they near the end of their journeys. She highlights five major regrets that individuals often confront when reflecting on their lives.

The first common regret she encounters is, “I didn’t spend enough time with the people I love.” Many people look back and realize that they missed out on valuable moments with their loved ones due to other priorities.

A second regret often heard is, “I worked too much and missed out on life.” The realization that time spent at work overshadowed personal joys and experiences is a tough reality for many facing their mortality.

A third regret revolves around fear: “I let fear control my decisions and didn’t take risks.” Ungerleider explains that, for many, the fear of the unknown or of failure kept them from taking opportunities they now wish they had embraced.

Another sentiment frequently expressed is, “I wish I’d been braver in the face of uncertainty or opportunity.” People realize too late that courage in the face of challenges could have led to richer, more fulfilling experiences.

Finally, Ungerleider observes that many regret losing touch with the present moment. “I focused too much on the future and lost touch with the present” is a lamentation she often hears, as people reflect on how they spent too much time worrying about what was to come rather than appreciating what they had in the present.

To help prevent these regrets, Ungerleider suggests a simple but profound practice: consistently reminding oneself that life is finite and uncertain. She advises individuals to regularly ask themselves key, life-defining questions: How do I want to spend my time? What matters most to me?

Ungerleider especially encourages younger people to adopt this habit of reflection. While they may not have yet faced serious health challenges or the mortality of loved ones, she believes that this practice is essential for living a long and healthy life with good quality.

“I’d recommend eating a balanced diet, exercising regularly, and avoiding things like smoking and high-risk activities. Reflecting on mortality should really be on that list,” she says. Ungerleider stresses that thinking about death is an integral part of living well: “Reflecting on our own mortality throughout life, whether you’re 20, 50, 80, whatever, allows us to live better every day with more meaning and purpose in our lives.”

Acknowledging death doesn’t have to be morbid—it can help individuals find beauty and value in life’s everyday moments. In a July episode of “The Happiness Lab” podcast, Alua Arthur, an author and founder of the end-of-life planning organization Going With Grace, echoed this sentiment. Arthur described how grounding herself in the reality of her mortality has helped her appreciate life’s small joys. “Grounding in my mortality means that at some point I won’t have access to all these senses anymore,” Arthur said. “And so, how cool is it that I can feel cold on my hands? How cool is it that I have plates for me to eat off of?”

Recognizing that death is inevitable can help people focus on what truly matters and bring more meaning into their lives. According to Ungerleider, reflecting on life’s impermanence allows us to live with greater intention and focus on what’s important, rather than getting lost in the distractions of daily life.

This idea of finding happiness and fulfillment by acknowledging life’s fragility resonates with others who have also worked closely with people nearing the end of their lives. Siddhartha Mukherjee, a Pulitzer Prize-winning author and oncologist, shared similar insights during his commencement speech at the University of Pennsylvania in May. Mukherjee emphasized that, on their deathbeds, people often express regret about not showing enough love and forgiveness to those they care about. “Waiting [to express yourself] merely delays the inevitable,” Mukherjee noted, suggesting that people should not postpone important emotional expressions or relationships.

Bronnie Ware, a former palliative care worker and author, also explored the regrets of those nearing death in her 2011 book, *The Top Five Regrets of the Dying*. One of the most frequent regrets she heard from patients was, “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.” In her work, Ware found that many individuals felt they had conformed to societal expectations rather than pursuing their own desires and dreams.

In a blog post, Ware further explained that people often don’t realize until the end that happiness is a choice. She observed that individuals can become trapped in familiar patterns and habits, which may not necessarily bring them joy. “Many did not realize until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits,” she wrote. “Life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. Choose happiness.”

The consistent message shared by Ungerleider, Mukherjee, Arthur, and Ware is that, in the face of death, people’s priorities tend to become clearer. Love, relationships, personal growth, and being true to oneself take on greater significance. This shift in perspective often leads to the realization that many of the things people once worried about—such as work, fear, and the future—are far less important than they once seemed.

By confronting mortality and reflecting on what truly matters, individuals can make more conscious choices about how they live. Whether it’s spending more time with loved ones, being braver in the face of uncertainty, or simply appreciating life’s small pleasures, the ultimate lesson is clear: life is precious, and we have the power to live it fully, free from regret.

Have you ever met someone who seems to defy the passage of time, looking much younger than their actual age? While some might think it’s all about genetics, the truth is, there’s often more at play. These individuals don’t just rely on good genes; they have lifestyle habits that contribute to their youthful appearance. In this article, we’ll explore eight daily habits that people who look up to 15 years younger than their age typically follow. What’s even better is that these habits are simple and within everyone’s reach.

1) They Prioritize Sleep

One of the most fundamental factors in maintaining a youthful appearance is sleep. People who look significantly younger than their age understand that quality sleep is vital. It’s not just about getting the recommended seven to eight hours, but also about sticking to a consistent sleep schedule. During sleep, the body undergoes repair processes, including skin regeneration. When we sleep, our skin rejuvenates, healing from the day’s wear and tear, which helps maintain a fresh, youthful look.

A lack of sleep, on the other hand, increases stress levels, and stress is a well-known factor that accelerates aging. Next time you’re tempted to stay up late watching TV or scrolling through social media, remember that prioritizing rest can have a long-term positive impact on your appearance.

2) They Stay Hydrated

One thing you’ll notice about people who seem to have found the secret to eternal youth is that they always carry water with them. Staying hydrated is a key factor in looking younger. A friend of mine, Sarah, who is in her 50s but looks like she’s in her mid-30s, is a perfect example. She always has a water bottle on hand and attributes her youthful skin and energy to staying hydrated. Proper hydration helps maintain the elasticity of the skin, flushes out toxins, and ensures that all bodily functions are running smoothly.

3) They Protect Their Skin From the Sun

It’s no secret that the sun’s harmful ultraviolet (UV) rays can cause premature aging. In fact, up to 90% of visible aging signs like wrinkles and sunspots are caused by exposure to the sun, a phenomenon known as photoaging. People who look younger than their age are diligent about protecting their skin. They don’t just wear sunscreen when they’re at the beach; they make it a daily habit, even on cloudy days. UV rays can penetrate clouds and windows, so these individuals often use skincare and makeup products with SPF as an additional protective measure.

By making sun protection a priority, they manage to keep their skin looking healthy and youthful for much longer than those who don’t.

4) They Lead an Active Lifestyle

People who look younger than their years understand the importance of physical activity. Regular exercise benefits not only the body but also the skin. It improves blood circulation, bringing more oxygen and nutrients to the skin, which results in a healthy, vibrant complexion. This goes beyond just maintaining a fit physique—exercise also boosts energy levels and reduces stress, both of which contribute to a youthful glow.

Their routines typically include a variety of activities, such as cardiovascular exercises, strength training, and flexibility workouts. These habits ensure that they not only look good but feel good as well.

5) They Cherish Their Relationships

It’s often said that laughter is the best medicine, and there’s some truth to that, especially when it comes to maintaining a youthful appearance. People who look younger than their age tend to have strong, healthy relationships and a vibrant social life. Emotional well-being is closely tied to physical health, and those who make time to connect with loved ones often radiate joy and positivity, which shows on their faces.

Whether it’s staying close with old friends, spending quality time with family, or forming new connections, these individuals prioritize relationships. The love, laughter, and emotional support they receive help keep them young at heart, which is reflected in their appearance.

6) They Follow a Balanced Diet

There are plenty of fad diets out there, but people who maintain a youthful look tend to stick to a balanced, nutrient-rich diet. They prioritize eating plenty of fruits, vegetables, lean proteins, and whole grains. This variety of nutrient-dense foods helps their bodies function optimally, providing essential vitamins and minerals that keep their skin glowing and energy levels high.

While they do indulge from time to time, they practice moderation and mindful eating, ensuring they enjoy their favorite treats without overdoing it. This balanced approach helps them stay healthy and look youthful without feeling deprived.

7) They Practice Mindfulness

In today’s fast-paced world, people who manage to stay youthful often make it a priority to slow down and practice mindfulness. Mindfulness involves being present and fully engaged in the current moment, and it has a range of benefits that can help maintain a youthful appearance. By reducing stress, improving mental clarity, and promoting a sense of inner peace, mindfulness contributes to overall well-being.

Many people who look younger than their age incorporate mindfulness practices like meditation, yoga, or simply taking a few moments each day to focus on their breathing. This not only helps them stay grounded and reduce anxiety but also promotes a healthy glow that comes from within.

8) They Cultivate a Positive Mindset

Perhaps the most important habit that people who look younger than their age have is cultivating a positive mindset. These individuals tend to have an optimistic outlook on life, which not only helps them handle challenges with grace but also contributes to their youthful appearance. A positive mindset reduces stress, and stress is one of the biggest culprits behind premature aging.

People with a sunny disposition tend to radiate joy, enthusiasm, and gratitude, which enhances both their inner and outer beauty. A happy, contented heart shines through in their faces, giving them a youthful glow that no skincare product can replicate.

A Holistic Approach to Youthfulness

As we’ve seen, looking younger isn’t just about having good genes. It’s about adopting daily habits that enhance both physical and emotional well-being. The eight habits discussed in this article—prioritizing sleep, staying hydrated, protecting the skin from the sun, leading an active lifestyle, cherishing relationships, following a balanced diet, practicing mindfulness, and cultivating a positive mindset—can make a significant difference in how you age.

These habits are not only simple but also achievable. By incorporating them into your daily routine, you can maintain a youthful energy and appearance that others will notice. So, why not start today? The results might surprise you and lead to a more vibrant, youthful life for years to come.

Earning your child’s respect is not something that happens just because you’re their parent. It comes from how you behave and the habits you model for them. As children grow, they observe these habits and decide how much respect they have for you based on what they see. To foster their respect as they get older, there are several habits you should be mindful of, and even let go of. In this article, we explore seven common parenting habits that may hinder gaining your child’s respect.

1) Being Overly Authoritative

Discipline is important, but there’s a fine line between maintaining control and becoming overly authoritative. Parents sometimes believe that being overly strict is the best way to keep order, but it can backfire, causing children to lose respect for them over time. When children feel they aren’t being heard or that their opinions don’t matter, they begin to see their parents as dictators instead of mentors.

Of course, it’s essential to set boundaries, but it’s just as important to give your child some degree of autonomy. Allow them to make decisions, even if they make mistakes along the way. Letting them learn from these experiences will help build respect and teach them life skills. In the end, this approach not only helps children feel valued but also deepens their respect for you as they grow.

2) Not Practicing What You Preach

Children pay more attention to what you do than what you say. A personal example of this occurred when my daughter, who loved to draw, once drew on the wall. I scolded her, but later that same week, she saw me marking measurements on the wall for a painting. Confused, she asked why I was allowed to draw on the wall, but she wasn’t. That incident made me realize that I wasn’t following the rules I set for her, which sent a mixed message.

This experience taught me that if I wanted my child to respect the house rules, I needed to respect them too. Being consistent with your actions, just as much as your words, fosters respect. After all, you can’t expect your children to respect you if you don’t follow the same guidelines you set for them.

3) Dismissing Their Interests

Children begin developing their own interests as young as three years old. Whether it’s dinosaurs, princesses, or even the solar system, these interests are important to them. When parents dismiss or belittle these interests, it can be discouraging. It signals to the child that their passions are insignificant, which can hurt their confidence.

On the other hand, showing interest in what your child enjoys is a way of validating their thoughts and feelings. It helps them feel seen, understood, and respected. So, the next time your child wants to share something they’re passionate about, whether it’s a cartoon they’ve watched a hundred times or facts about space, tune in and engage. These conversations could lead to a deeper bond and greater mutual respect between you and your child.

4) Neglecting Promises

For children, promises are like laws. When you make a promise and keep it, you demonstrate reliability and trustworthiness. However, breaking promises, even small ones, can erode their trust in you. Imagine promising your child a trip to the park, only to cancel at the last minute. This sends the message that your commitments aren’t important, and children notice.

Our actions set a precedent, and if we fail to honor our commitments, how can we expect our children to do the same? By consistently keeping your promises, no matter how small, you build a foundation of respect and trust with your child.

5) Avoiding Difficult Conversations

One of the most challenging moments as a parent came when my son asked me about death. It was a difficult topic that I initially avoided, but he kept asking. Eventually, I realized that if I didn’t explain it to him, someone else might, and not in a way that was appropriate or sensitive to his understanding.

Avoiding tough conversations can create distance between you and your child. They may feel that you’re not open to discussing serious matters, and over time, they may stop turning to you for guidance. Being honest and open, even about uncomfortable subjects, shows your child that they can trust you with any concern. This openness not only fosters respect but also strengthens the bond between you and your child.

6) Always Solving Their Problems

As parents, it’s natural to want to solve our children’s problems and protect them from challenges. However, constantly stepping in can prevent them from developing their own problem-solving skills. When parents take over too often, children may feel as though their abilities aren’t trusted, which can harm their confidence.

Instead of immediately solving every issue, guide your child through the problem-solving process. This way, they learn to think independently and find solutions on their own. At the same time, they will respect you for supporting them in their growth, rather than fixing everything for them.

7) Not Showing Them Respect

Perhaps the most important point is the simplest: If you want your child to respect you, you must respect them. This means respecting their time, their feelings, their thoughts, and their space. Respect is a two-way street, and children learn how to show respect by seeing it in action.

When you model respectful behavior toward your child, they are more likely to reciprocate. Showing respect for your child is fundamental to building a strong, respectful relationship as they grow. By treating your child with the dignity and consideration they deserve, you teach them how to respect you and others in return.

Earning your child’s respect involves more than just expecting it because you are their parent. It requires mindful habits and consistent actions that demonstrate respect, trust, and understanding. By letting go of habits like being overly authoritative, not practicing what you preach, or dismissing your child’s interests, you create an environment where mutual respect can thrive.

Pavel Durov is a man of many identities: a programming genius, a billionaire entrepreneur, a controversial figure accused of aligning with the Kremlin, and a champion for free speech. Recently, Durov, the founder of Telegram, was detained in France, bringing renewed attention to his enigmatic persona. Often compared to tech figures like Mark Zuckerberg, Jack Dorsey, and Elon Musk, Durov is known for his unconventional lifestyle and libertarian ideals. Like Musk, he has an obsession with pronatalism, having claimed in July that he has fathered over 100 children through sperm donations over the past 15 years.

With an estimated net worth of $9.15 billion according to Bloomberg, Durov holds multiple passports and maintains residences across various countries. He has spent the last decade as a global citizen, advocating for communication free from government surveillance. His recent legal troubles have reignited debates surrounding Telegram’s end-to-end encryption, which secures user communications even from the company’s employees, versus the security concerns of several governments and the European Union’s efforts to regulate big tech.

A Tale of Two Prodigies

Born in 1984 in the Soviet Union, Durov moved to Italy with his family at the age of four. They returned to Russia after the Soviet Union collapsed, as Durov’s father accepted a position at St. Petersburg State University. In a rare interview with Tucker Carlson earlier this year, Durov shared that both he and his older brother, Nikolai, were mathematical prodigies from a young age. While Pavel excelled locally, Nikolai was a child star, appearing on Italian television to solve cubic equations and winning multiple gold medals at the International Math Olympiad.

“We were both very passionate about coding and designing stuff,” Durov recalled. Upon their return to Russia, the family brought back an IBM PC XT from Italy, which was rare in Russia during the early 1990s. This gave the brothers a unique opportunity to teach themselves programming.

Russia’s Answer to Zuckerberg

Durov’s programming skills and entrepreneurial spirit led him to create Vkontakte (VK) in 2006, a social media platform that quickly became known as the “Facebook of Russia.” Durov was often referred to as Russia’s Mark Zuckerberg. However, his relationship with the Kremlin soured faster than Zuckerberg’s with Washington.

When VK was used by protesters to organize demonstrations in Kyiv against Ukraine’s pro-Russian president, Viktor Yanukovich, in 2013, the Kremlin demanded that VK hand over private data of Ukrainian users. Durov refused. “We decided to refuse, and that didn’t go too well with the Russian government,” he told Carlson. This decision marked the end of his tenure at VK. Durov resigned as CEO and eventually sold his shares for millions, leaving Russia behind. Today, VK is under state control.

“For me, it was never about becoming rich. Everything in my life was about becoming free. To the extent that is possible, my mission in life is to allow other people to become free,” Durov stated, adding, “I don’t want to take orders from anyone.”

A Messaging App for the Masses

Unlike Zuckerberg, who acquired WhatsApp to expand his social media empire, Durov decided to create his own messaging app despite a saturated market. He believed that existing messaging apps were inadequate. “It doesn’t matter how many messaging apps are out there if all of them suck,” Durov said in a 2015 interview with TechCrunch.

His experience with the Kremlin strongly influenced his decision to create Telegram, a messaging app based in Dubai. Durov and his brother aimed to build a platform that was beyond the reach of government surveillance. Telegram’s robust end-to-end encryption and commitment to privacy attracted hundreds of millions of users, including, controversially, the terrorists who orchestrated the Paris attacks in November 2015.

The use of Telegram by terrorists led Durov to engage in a public relations campaign, including an interview with CNN, to clarify that Telegram was not becoming a tool for terrorists. He argued that Telegram was simply the most secure messaging platform available and that compromising its encryption would undermine its appeal and the company’s commitment to privacy. “You cannot make it safe against criminals and open for governments,” Durov told CNN in 2016. “It’s either secure or not secure.”

Clashes with the Kremlin and Other Governments

Telegram’s refusal to provide decryption keys put it at odds with governments worldwide, including Russia. In 2018, Moscow attempted to ban Telegram after the company refused to comply with a demand to hand over decryption keys to Russian security services. Durov vowed to defy the ban, and another showdown with the Kremlin seemed imminent. However, the ban was lifted in 2020 without further conflict.

Since then, Telegram has become one of the few foreign social media platforms operating in Russia without significant restrictions. It is now the preferred communication tool for many Russian government officials. Critics have long speculated that Telegram’s unrestricted operation in Russia might indicate some sort of concession to the Kremlin, a claim Durov has consistently denied, often citing his earlier conflict with Russian authorities as evidence of his independence. Telegram reiterated in a statement to CNN that no deals were made with the Kremlin to lift the ban.

Before his detention in Paris, Durov was in Azerbaijan simultaneously with Russian President Vladimir Putin, who was on an official visit. Kremlin spokesman Dmitry Peskov told reporters that the two did not meet. Despite Durov’s public disavowal of Russia, the government swiftly acted to assist him after his detention. Russian Foreign Ministry spokeswoman Maria Zakharova noted that the Russian Embassy in Paris “immediately got down to work” upon learning of Durov’s legal issues.

Ongoing Controversies

Western governments continue to be unsettled by Telegram’s use by money launderers, drug traffickers, and those spreading child exploitation content. Durov’s detention in France was related to a warrant concerning Telegram’s lack of content moderation, as reported by CNN-affiliate BFMTV. Telegram responded with a statement declaring, “it is absurd to claim that a platform or its owner are responsible for abuse of that platform.” The company emphasized that it complies with EU laws and that Durov has nothing to hide.

Navigating the world of dating and relationships can often feel like venturing into an unknown territory without a clear path. You’re drawn to her, and you believe she might feel the same, but how can you be sure? This uncertainty may have kept you awake on more than one occasion. The signals aren’t always clear or obvious, often leaving you questioning if you’re overanalyzing her behavior.

Rather than expecting grand gestures or straightforward conversations, it’s often the smallest signs that reveal the most about her true feelings. Below is a guide to help you recognize those subtle cues that often indicate a woman is highly attracted to you, even if they are not as evident as one might hope.

1. Increased Eye Contact

Attraction is frequently communicated through our eyes, an instinctual behavior that’s difficult to conceal. When a woman is significantly attracted to you, you may catch her making more eye contact than what is considered typical. This is not in a way that feels invasive but rather one that shows genuine interest. It’s as if she’s trying to capture every detail about you, observing your expressions and mannerisms closely. You might even notice her pupils dilating when she looks at you, a physiological response commonly linked to attraction.

It’s important to note that this doesn’t necessarily mean she’ll maintain constant eye contact. Some people are naturally shy or uncomfortable with prolonged eye contact. However, if you notice that her eyes often find their way back to you, it’s a good sign she’s attracted. The way she looks at you matters as well—if her gaze lingers, if she smiles with her eyes, or seems genuinely engaged when you’re talking, these are all subtle indicators of her attraction.

Of course, this is just one sign and should not be taken as definitive proof of her feelings. But it certainly suggests a promising beginning.

2. Laughter at Your Jokes

Laughter is a universal sign of enjoyment and comfort. When a woman finds you funny, it indicates that she feels at ease around you and appreciates your company. A personal experience of this is when I was out with friends, and a woman in the group laughed at even my most lackluster jokes. I’m aware that I’m not a stand-up comedian, but she found everything I said amusing. It wasn’t just polite laughter; it was genuine, hearty laughter that caused her eyes to crinkle at the corners. At first, I assumed she was simply a cheerful person, but when I noticed she didn’t laugh as much or as heartily with others, I realized she might be attracted to me.

Laughter is a potent sign of attraction because it shows that she appreciates your sense of humor and enjoys being around you. So if you observe her laughing more with you than others, consider it a positive indication of her feelings.

3. Initiating Physical Contact

Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “We touch things to know if they are real,” and this applies to attraction as well. When a woman is attracted to you, she may find subtle ways to initiate physical contact. This could be a light touch on your arm while laughing at your joke, brushing off lint from your shirt, or even a playful punch when you say something teasing.

These touches, though brief, are not accidental. They represent her way of establishing a connection with you and gauging your reaction. These touches often carry a certain energy that’s difficult to define but easy to feel.

Naturally, some individuals are more touchy-feely than others by nature. However, if she doesn’t touch others the way she touches you, it’s a strong indication of her attraction. Remember, consent is essential. If her touches make you uncomfortable, it’s important to communicate that clearly and respectfully.

4. Mirroring Your Actions

Mirroring is a psychological phenomenon where people subconsciously mimic the gestures, speech patterns, or attitudes of those they interact with. If you notice her copying your body language, it’s a sign that she’s attuned to you and trying to establish rapport. For instance, if you lean in while talking, she might do the same. If you touch your face during the conversation, she might mirror that action.

This behavior is typically subconscious and happens when we’re trying to connect with someone. So the next time you’re with her, pay close attention to her body language. If she’s mirroring your actions, it’s a promising sign that she’s attracted to you.

5. Initiating Conversations

Imagine you’re at a social gathering and notice that she’s often the one starting conversations with you. Or perhaps she’s sending more texts than you are. This behavior clearly indicates that she’s interested in getting to know you better.

When a woman is highly attracted to you, she will want to keep communication open and will not wait for you to initiate every conversation. She may ask about your day, your interests, and your thoughts on various topics, all of which are signs that she genuinely wants to understand you better.

It’s about more than just small talk. Her desire to create deeper connections and understandings signifies her attraction. If she’s making an effort to engage in conversation regularly, it’s a strong indication that she’s drawn to you.

6. Compliments

Receiving compliments from someone we’re attracted to is always a wonderful feeling. When a woman is highly attracted to you, she will often express her feelings through compliments. These could range from comments on your appearance to your intellect, sense of humor, or even your taste in music. Essentially, she appreciates you and isn’t afraid to show it.

While friends also compliment each other, there’s usually a different tone when it comes from someone who’s attracted to you—it feels more personal, more intimate. So pay attention to her words. If her compliments feel genuine and personal, it’s likely she’s attracted to you.

7. Genuine Interest in Your Life

When a woman is attracted to you, she becomes genuinely interested in your world. She wants to know the details of your day, your likes and dislikes, and your dreams and fears. She will ask about your family, hobbies, work, and even the most mundane aspects of your life. And when you speak, she listens—really listens.

Attraction goes beyond just physical appearance; it’s about connection, compatibility, and mutual interest. If she’s showing genuine interest in your life, it means she wants to understand you deeply, not just on a surface level.

8. Making Time for You

Perhaps the most telling sign of all is when a woman makes time for you. No matter how busy her schedule is, if she’s attracted to you, she’ll find a way to fit you in. This is because, despite our busy lives filled with commitments and responsibilities, when we’re truly attracted to someone, we prioritize them.

If she’s always there, willing to make time for you, it’s a very good sign that she values the connection you share.

Final Thoughts

Decoding attraction is an intriguing journey. While these signs offer guidance, it’s essential to remember that each woman is unique and may express her interest differently. Mutual respect and understanding are key in any interaction. Authentic attraction is about more than just surface-level signs; it’s about shared values and genuine connection.

Don’t rush to conclusions based on a few signs. Take your time to understand her, respect her individuality, and allow the relationship to develop naturally. As Maya Angelou wisely said, “People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” If she’s truly attracted to you, she’ll make you feel valued and respected. Ultimately, that’s what really matters.

Aging is often associated with a decline in vitality, yet many people in their 60s and older demonstrate that youthfulness transcends mere numbers. This observation has led me, Lachlan Brown, founder of Hack Spirit and a dedicated mindfulness advocate, to explore the habits of individuals who seem to defy the typical aging process. From my experiences, I’ve learned that maintaining a youthful demeanor is less about genetics or luck and more about daily practices.

In this article, I will highlight eight daily habits that contribute to a youthful appearance and energy levels in people who are well into their later years. These habits aren’t the result of chance but of deliberate choices. Read on to discover how adopting these practices can help you also look and feel younger.

Firstly, regular movement is crucial. In health circles, there’s a popular saying that “sitting is the new smoking.” This phrase isn’t just a buzzword; it’s supported by scientific research. Individuals who maintain their youthfulness into their 60s and beyond tend to be anything but sedentary. They embrace a range of physical activities, from walking and yoga to dancing, swimming, and cycling. They recognize that keeping the body in motion is essential, not just for staying fit but for maintaining overall well-being. Regular movement helps manage weight, maintain flexible joints, strengthen muscles and bones, and enhance mood and energy levels. Additionally, it benefits cognitive function. As Carl Jung famously said, “The creation of something new is not accomplished by the intellect but by the play instinct acting from inner necessity. The creative mind plays with the objects it loves.” Therefore, find a physical activity that you enjoy and make it a regular part of your life to sustain a youthful demeanor.

Mindfulness is another powerful habit that contributes to feeling and looking young. As someone deeply invested in mindfulness, I can attest to its profound effects. Daily mindfulness practices, such as meditation, can help clear the mind, reduce stress, and foster a sense of calm and well-being. I recall my initial skepticism about meditation, but as I consistently practiced focusing on my breath and letting thoughts drift without judgment, I noticed a shift. My mind became clearer, and I felt more present. People who age gracefully often incorporate mindfulness into their routines. Whether through meditation, journaling, yoga, or simply taking moments to breathe deeply, mindfulness helps maintain mental health and a positive outlook, both of which contribute to a youthful spirit. Remember, “You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.” Consider making mindfulness one of your new goals.

Diet is another critical factor in aging well. What you eat affects how you feel and look. Those who age gracefully understand the impact of a nutrient-dense diet. They recognize that processed foods, sugars, and unhealthy fats can accelerate aging, whereas fruits, vegetables, lean proteins, and whole grains can slow it down. My book, “Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego,” explores the concept of mindful eating, which emphasizes being fully aware of and intentional about your food choices. Mindful eating not only enhances physical health but also fosters gratitude for the food we consume, contributing to a positive and youthful outlook. As the saying goes, food is fuel; better fuel leads to better performance.

Maintaining strong social connections is also vital. Psychological research highlights that social bonds contribute to a sense of belonging and purpose, potentially extending lifespan. Those who age gracefully often nurture relationships with family, friends, and their community. They understand that social isolation can lead to loneliness and depression, which may hasten the aging process. Conversely, staying socially active promotes mental health, sharpens cognitive functions, and supports a positive view of life. Participating in community activities or volunteering are effective ways to foster social connections, providing both interaction and a sense of purpose.

Embracing change is another key to youthful aging. While many people fear the passage of time, those who age gracefully see it as an opportunity for growth and exploration. They view each year as a new chapter, filled with potential rather than something to resist. By adapting to change, whether it’s physical, social, or personal, they maintain a positive outlook and reduce stress, which contributes to their youthful spirit.

Prioritizing rest and recovery is crucial in maintaining a youthful appearance and energy levels. In a society that often values constant productivity, understanding the importance of rest can make a significant difference. Individuals who remain youthful recognize that good-quality sleep is essential for the body’s repair processes. They also value regular breaks throughout the day to recharge, whether by stepping away from their work or engaging in relaxing activities like deep breathing or short naps.

Regular self-reflection is another transformative habit. Taking time to reflect on life, decisions, and experiences fosters clarity, personal growth, and wisdom. Journaling is a practical method for self-reflection, allowing individuals to process thoughts, emotions, and track personal development. For example, after a challenging interaction with a friend, journaling about it helped me understand my role in the conflict better and facilitated emotional growth. This practice supports a positive outlook and a youthful mindset.

Lastly, maintaining a positive outlook is crucial. Positivity isn’t just a feel-good trait; it’s integral to aging well. People who look and feel young into their later years often have a consistent positive perspective on life. They choose to see the silver lining in every situation and understand that while they can’t control all external events, they can control their responses. Research shows that a positive attitude can lower the risk of chronic diseases, enhance resilience, and even extend lifespan. When facing challenges, focusing on the positives can significantly benefit your overall well-being.

Aging is a natural process, but how we age islargely within our control. By adopting these eight habits—embracing movement, mindfulness, a nutritious diet, strong social connections, change, rest, self-reflection, and positivity—you canmaintain a youthful appearance and spirit. Embrace these practices to make the most of the journey through your golden years.

Gabriele Sewtz, a real estate agent from Brooklyn with a data-driven mindset and a simple breakfast preference for oatmeal, never considered herself someone drawn to wellness retreats. Her perception changed dramatically when she entered menopause and found herself exploring a ranch near Austin, Texas, where she tried sound baths, cold plunges, and breathwork—and ended up loving the experience.

Sewtz is part of a growing trend of women seeking resorts and hotels that offer specialized programs for menopause. Reflecting on her transformative retreat experience, she admitted, “If you had told me upfront how life-changing that (retreat) would be, I’m like, ‘Yeah, right. Not going to happen in a million years. Others might experience it, but definitely not me.’”

Menopause brings about significant physical, emotional, and psychological changes, which vary from one woman to another. As the wellness industry evolves, it has started to address the needs of women undergoing perimenopause and menopause. An increasing number of supplements, skincare brands, and nutrition programs target this demographic, with some women finding comfort in spas or hotels rather than traditional medical settings. “It always starts, I think, as a personal journey,” Sewtz noted.

Dr. Barbra Hanna, an ob-gyn based in Chicago and founder of MyMenopauseRX, a telehealth service specializing in menopause care, described the current focus on menopause as “having a moment.” She emphasized the importance of self-care, particularly since many women dealing with menopause symptoms also face additional life stressors, such as raising children, managing careers, or caring for elderly family members. While she views spas as excellent places for relaxation, she believes they may not be the best environment for medical care.

Dr. Naresh Perembuduri, an Ayurvedic doctor at the prestigious Ananda resort in the Himalayas—endorsed by celebrities like Uma Thurman and Oprah—expressed the view that menopause treatment should encompass more than just addressing the symptoms. “It is not simply the menopause we want to address. Before the menopause, they need to prepare themselves for a proper hormonal balance,” Perembuduri explained. Therefore, Ananda offers a “hormonal rebalance” program rather than a specific menopause-focused one.

Ananda’s 14-day program includes customized meal plans, exercise routines, and hormone testing, starting at $1,000 per night. However, the high cost and ongoing social stigma around menopause might deter some women from participating. With 51% of the world’s population being female, the symptoms of menopause—such as joint pain, hot flashes, mood swings, weight changes, and discomfort during sex—differ widely, complicating treatment approaches.

For those already inclined toward wellness travel, menopause symptoms can be an added incentive to visit a spa or retreat. Actress Josie Bissett, who had previously attended other wellness programs, chose Costa Rica’s The Retreat for a program specifically addressing menopausal changes. She told CNN that her experience with the seven-day “The Big M” program was so fulfilling that she extended her stay. “It was one of the most beautiful places and experiences I’ve ever had,” Bissett said. “There’s no manicures or pedicures. It’s not that place. This is a place to heal, to be nurtured.”

Sewtz’s retreat, organized by fitness influencer Hannah Eden, was designed for group participation. In contrast, Bissett preferred solitude. “I really needed time to myself,” she explained. “I wanted to take away from myself that feeling of, like, I should talk to people, I should be social, I should… No shoulds. You take care of you. You don’t have to do anything that you don’t want to do. You’re here for you. You don’t have to be friends with anybody.”

Despite the appeal of alternative therapies, some medical professionals advise caution. Dr. Hanna warns that treatments claiming to offer medical miracles beyond simple stress relief should be approached with skepticism. “If they want to offer you a lot of blood-testing, saliva-testing, fingerprints, all of these things, that is not evidence-based, that is not how we treat menopause. That’s red flag number one,” she said.

Hanna also cautions that while menopause-focused wellness businesses are capitalizing on this growing market, “A massage is a massage, a facial is a facial. There’s no extra lotions and potions that are going to be transformative for you because of perimenopause or menopause, at least not today.” However, she remains hopeful about future advancements, noting, “I don’t think menopause is going out of fashion. I think menopause is just getting started,” especially with increased funding for menopause research in the coming years.

Expats in Denmark are reportedly among the happiest in their work lives, as revealed by the latest Expat Insider survey from InterNations, an online global community for expatriates. Denmark leads the list for job satisfaction, career opportunities, and work-life balance.

The survey collected responses from over 12,500 expatriates, reflecting their sentiments on four major categories related to work, including career prospects, salary and job security, work culture and satisfaction, and work and leisure. Denmark topped the rankings for work culture and satisfaction, as well as work and leisure.

A notable 84% of expats in Denmark expressed satisfaction with their work-life balance, compared to the global average of 60%. Similarly, a high percentage of expats are content with their work hours, averaging 39.2 hours per week versus the global average of 42.5 hours.

The top 10 countries where expats are happiest with their work lives abroad are as follows:

1. Denmark
2. Saudi Arabia
3. Belgium
4. Netherlands
5. Luxembourg
6. United Arab Emirates
7. Australia
8. Mexico
9. Indonesia
10. Austria

Ilana Buhl, a contributor to CNBC Make It and an American teacher who relocated to Denmark, highlights several positive changes she experienced after moving from Texas to Copenhagen. These changes include shorter workweeks, stronger boundaries around off-hours, five weeks of paid vacation, and a higher salary that aligns well with the lower cost of living. Beyond work, Buhl appreciates Denmark’s robust public transit, public healthcare, affordable daycare, and generous maternity leave funded by both her employer and the government. “Many of these factors contribute to the fact that Denmark consistently ranks as one of the happiest countries in the world,” Buhl notes, referencing the annual World Happiness Report.

Saudi Arabia ranks second, with 75% of expats reporting improved career prospects after moving there, compared to the global average of 56%. A majority of newcomers, 63%, relocate to Saudi Arabia for work, where they find satisfaction with the local economy. In contrast, only 35% of expats globally cite job-related reasons for their move. However, the long working hours in Saudi Arabia, averaging 47.8 hours per week, may be a downside.

Belgium completes the top three, with expats highly satisfied with job security, the local job market, and career opportunities. In Belgium, 68% of expats report enjoying workplace flexibility, including the ability to work remotely. The average full-time workweek in Belgium is 40.8 hours, shorter than the global average.

Panama is recognized as the No. 1 best country for expats overall according to the InterNations survey. This ranking considers broader life and financial factors, with expats expressing satisfaction with the quality of life, ease of settling in, working abroad, personal finances, and an “expat essentials” index that covers housing, administration, language, and digital life.

Denmark stands out as the top destination for expats seeking a fulfilling work life, with its strong work culture, satisfactory work-life balance, and numerous benefits outside of work. Saudi Arabia and Belgium also offer significant advantages for expatriates, despite some challenges like longer working hours in Saudi Arabia. Overall, these countries provide a supportive environment for career growth and job satisfaction.

An international study has revealed that nearly one in six adolescents have encountered cyberbullying, with an increase in such incidents among school-aged children since the onset of the pandemic, as reported by the World Health Organization (WHO). Conducted across 44 countries and regions, the study involved over 279,000 young participants. In Wales, where approximately 37,000 youths were surveyed, 17% reported being victims of cyberbullying. The Health Behaviour in School-aged Children (HBSC) survey indicates a rise in the proportion of adolescents experiencing cyberbullying since 2018, with figures climbing from 12% to 15% for boys and from 13% to 16% for girls.

England and Scotland also witnessed alarming rates of cyberbullying among their youth. In England, out of over 4,200 respondents, nearly one in five (19%) disclosed being cyberbullied at least once or twice in recent months, with 11% admitting to perpetrating cyberbullying themselves. Similarly, in Scotland, where more than 4,300 young individuals participated, 18% reported experiencing cyberbullying, while 11% acknowledged engaging in cyberbullying behavior.

The report underscores an “urgent need” to enhance awareness among young people, families, and educational institutions regarding the various forms of cyberbullying and its consequences. Dr. Hans Henri P. Kluge, WHO’s regional director for Europe, emphasized the heightened prevalence of cyberbullying amidst the COVID-19 pandemic, as social interactions shifted predominantly online during lockdowns. He stressed the imperative of addressing virtual forms of peer violence to safeguard the health and well-being of adolescents and young individuals. With youths spending significant amounts of time online daily, even minor fluctuations in bullying rates can significantly impact their overall health and well-being, warranting comprehensive action to combat cyberbullying as both a health and human rights concern.

Sarah Hannafin, a senior policy adviser for the NAHT school leaders’ union, expressed deep concern over the escalating rates of cyberbullying among children. She highlighted the pervasive nature of online bullying, which can occur anytime and anywhere, underscoring that schools alone cannot tackle the issue. Hannafin urged swift and effective implementation of the Online Safety Act by the government, emphasizing the crucial role of social media platforms in providing a safe online environment.

Responding to these concerns, a spokesperson for the UK government reiterated their commitment to making the UK the safest place for children online through the Online Safety Act. The act mandates companies to take decisive measures to protect children from harmful content, illegal activities, and abuse, including cyberbullying. Non-compliant companies risk facing fines of up to 10% of their global annual revenue, potentially amounting to billions of pounds.

Finland has once again secured the top position on the annual ranking of the happiest countries globally, marking its seventh consecutive year in this esteemed spot. The ranking, curated by the World Happiness Report, is determined by factors such as self-assessed life evaluations and responses to the Cantril ladder question, which prompts individuals to rate their current lives on a scale from 0 to 10, with 10 representing the best possible life for them.

The report, compiled by the Wellbeing Research Centre at the University of Oxford, assesses over 130 countries, taking into account variables such as GDP per capita, social support, healthy life expectancy, freedom, generosity, and freedom from corruption. While the top ten countries have remained relatively stable, the top 20 witnessed some changes, with Costa Rica and Kuwait ascending to the 12th and 13th positions, respectively, while the United States and Germany dropped out of the top 20 entirely, with the U.S. sliding from 15th to 23rd place this year.

Among the top ten happiest nations, only the Netherlands and Australia boast populations exceeding 15 million, while in the top 20, only Canada and the U.K. surpass 30 million inhabitants.

Finnland maintains its lead as the happiest country globally, scoring 7.741. Frank Martela, a Finnish philosopher and psychology researcher, attributes the nation’s happiness to its strong sense of community, altruistic behaviors, and individuals finding a clear purpose for themselves. Martela suggests that it might be more precise to say that Finland harbors the fewest unhappy individuals worldwide.

Finnland’s excellence extends beyond happiness rankings, as evidenced by its performance in education, work-life balance, environmental quality, social connections, safety, and life satisfaction, according to the Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development (OECD) Better Life Index. The country also boasts a life expectancy at birth of approximately 82 years, with women outliving men by an average of six years. Moreover, 96% of Finns believe they have someone reliable to lean on in times of need, as per the OECD Better Life Index.

Denmark secures the second spot on the happiness index with a score of 7.583. The nation’s high ranking is attributed, in part, to its commitment to equality and social welfare responsibilities, according to its official website. These factors are closely associated with happiness, according to the World Happiness Report.

Despite Denmark’s reputation for imposing some of the world’s highest taxes, which can reach up to half of an individual’s income, the benefits counterbalance the costs. The country offers free healthcare, subsidized childcare, tuition-free education for university students along with grants to cover expenses, and pensions for the elderly coupled with caregiver support.

According to the OECD Better Life Index, Denmark surpasses the global average in various domains including employment, education, healthcare, environmental quality, social connections, civic engagement, and life satisfaction. Additionally, Denmark holds membership in prominent international organizations such as the OECD and NATO.

Loneliness is a pressing health threat, with serious consequences for the health and mental well-being of the elderly and young people worldwide, said the World Health Organisation (WHO) on Friday.

Social isolation — having an insufficient number of social connections, and loneliness — and the social pain of not feeling connected are widespread.

Contrary to the perception that isolation and loneliness primarily affect older people in high-income countries, they impact the health and well-being of all age groups across the world.

According to research, social isolation is common among one in four older people and in five to 15 per cent adolescents. However, these figures are likely to be underestimations.

To address it, the UN health body announced a new Commission on Social Connection which will promote social connection as a priority and accelerate the scaling up of solutions in countries of all incomes.

“High rates of social isolation and loneliness around the world have serious consequences for health and well-being. People without enough strong social connections are at higher risk of stroke, anxiety, dementia, depression, suicide and more,” said WHO Director-General Dr Tedros Adhanom Ghebreyesus, in a statement.

“This WHO Commission will help establish social connection as a global health priority and share the most promising interventions,” he added.

The Commission, to be co-chaired by US Surgeon General, Dr Vivek Murthy, and African Union Youth Envoy, Chido Mpemba, will have 11 leading policy-makers, thought leaders and advocates.

Running for three years, it will analyse the central role social connection plays in improving health for people of all ages and outline solutions to build social connections at scale.

The Commission will consider how connection enhances the well-being of our communities and societies and helps foster economic progress, social development, and innovation.

Studies show that lack of social connection carries an equivalent, or even greater, risk of early death as other better-known risk factors – such as smoking, excessive drinking, physical inactivity, obesity, and air pollution.

Social isolation also has a serious impact on physical and mental health; studies show that it has been linked to anxiety and depression and can increase risk of cardiovascular disease by 30 per cent.

The Commission on Social Connection, supported by a Secretariat based at WHO, will hold its first leadership-level meeting from December 6 to 8, the WHO said. (IANS)

Economist Melissa Kearney’s recent book, “The Two-Parent Privilege: How Americans Stopped Getting Married and Started Falling Behind,” has sparked a wide range of reactions, with some critics accusing her of stigmatizing single mothers, while others view her findings as a validation of their support for marriage. In this book, Kearney argues that children raised by two parents have a higher chance of success, and the marital status of parents significantly impacts their children’s success.

Kearney’s argument runs counter to the trend in the United States, where an increasing number of children are being born and raised by single mothers. The U.S. has the highest rate of children living in single-parent households globally, with approximately 23% of U.S. children under the age of 18 living with a single parent and no other adults.

Kearney’s research shows that this trend is detrimental to children, widens inequality, and has far-reaching consequences for society as a whole. She is sounding the alarm and calling for a conversation on this issue.

“I’ve achieved what I aimed for, which was to initiate a discussion,” Kearney states. “But I am frustrated that the initial reaction is often knee-jerk.”

Critics on both sides have expressed their discomfort with Kearney’s focus on one family structure over another. However, Kearney emphasizes that she is not prioritizing one family type over another but is merely acknowledging the data, evidence, and the reality of the situation.

One undeniable fact is the increasing number of women who are choosing to have children and remain single. In 2019, almost half of all babies born in the U.S. were born to unmarried women, a significant increase from 1960 when only 5% of births were to unmarried mothers. This shift towards single motherhood is not due to divorce, as many unpartnered mothers have never been married.

While some children raised by single mothers achieve great success, the overall data indicates that those growing up in single-mother households face lower odds of high school graduation, college degrees, and high earnings in adulthood. Kearney’s research shows that families led by single mothers are five times more likely to live in poverty than those headed by married couples. The presence of two adults in a household who can contribute to the income significantly reduces the likelihood of poverty. Raising children demands various resources, including financial support, time, emotional energy, and more.

Single mothers often start from a disadvantaged position, with lower levels of education and income. This discrepancy exists across racial and ethnic lines. Many single mothers do not have support from other adults, such as grandparents or family members, which places the full burden of financial support and caregiving on the mother. This situation can lead to exhaustion and added stress, with no one to provide support when needed.

Kearney’s focus on single mothers is based on their large number, as single fathers represent a much smaller fraction. Kearney is especially concerned about boys growing up without fathers as role models, which can have negative consequences. Data shows that boys from disadvantaged homes are more likely to face difficulties at school and within the criminal justice system.

In summary, Kearney’s research underscores that single parenting, particularly when the mother is unmarried, can have a profound impact on children’s outcomes and can contribute to inequality and reduced social mobility. While the decline in marriage rates and the evolving definitions of family structures have changed societal norms, Kearney emphasizes that the data indicates the benefits of a stable, long-term, two-parent household in raising children.

The decline in marriage rates and the challenges faced by men without college degrees have led to more women entering the workforce and an increase in their earnings, making them less likely to marry men who cannot provide economic security or stability. The economic changes and shifts in gender roles have altered the dynamics of marriage and family structures.

Kearney aims to draw attention to the issue of single parenting and its impact on inequality and mobility in the United States, seeking to engage both conservatives and progressives in a much-needed conversation on this complex and important topic.

I apologize for any confusion. I understand your request, and I will provide a paraphrased version of the article.

In the era of online dating and the advancement of technology, love knows no boundaries. Romance has found new avenues that do not adhere to any barriers, especially to that of age.  It is reported that there is a steady rise in the number of senior users on their app by dating app QuackQuack. It ran a poll among its senior users to better understand the changing dynamics of love and companionship.

The online survey ran for three days among a total of 6,000 participants from metros and smaller cities. The survey participants ranged between 50 and 68 years; a majority of them are retired,
and a portion of these daters are business owners. The survey results show the paradigm shift in societal attitudes towards love and romance in the later stages of life.

Breaking Bad Norms 

38 per cent of seniors from Tier 1 cities on the app explained how society would rather have them join a golf club or a yoga class, but dating is pretty much taboo for a retired individual. A man or a woman above 50 looking for romantic endeavors still instigates a lot of talks, but these seniors revealed they pay no heed to such gossip because having a healthy love life is much more satisfying than poking your noses into other’s business. They also mentioned how they find dating apps a more private way of finding love, keeping your love under wraps, especially from nosey neighbors.

Online dating to the rescue 

34 per cent of male daters from Tier 2 cities between the ages of 50 and 65 explained how online dating has turned out to be their saviour. 7 per cent of these men are widowed, 9 per cent
divorced, and 18 per cent never married. They disclosed the difficulties of dating in a small Indian city.

Firstly, women of that age are under more pressure from society than men. Hence, finding a suitable partner with the same emotional maturity and freedom to choose love over societal stigma is the biggest challenge. But on dating apps, they stated, people can connect from any part of the country, and not just their locality. Moreover, it offers the kind of privacy that is not possible in real life. Plus, the facility to chat with a person for a while before taking it IRL allows these men ample time to evaluate if they are being duped.

Companionship Over Love 

27 per cent of women above 50 voiced that companionship, the genuine kind, is superior to love, and that is what they are seeking. They mentioned being in relationships, experiencing true love,
and even truer heartbreaks when they were young, and after all these years, they have come to realise that comfortable companionship is what matters in the end. They also disclosed the exact
requirements on their bio, so no man will come with expectations that do not align with what they are willing to offer.

Success Stories 

8 per cent of the survey participants claim to have found genuine love on the app. 12 per cent of women mentioned they have found friends like family and urged more seniors to start using dating and friendship apps; age should never be the factor in deciding whether one deserves to find real connections. (IANS)

Steve Jobs’ Perspective:

Steve Jobs: it’s easy to think the Apple co-founder (did you know there were actually three?) possessed something — intelligence, talent, creativity, connections, etc. — that you don’t.

But here’s the thing. Scratch the surface of even the most successful people and you’ll likely find they suffer from impostor syndrome: the inner belief they’re inadequate and mediocre, despite objective evidence that proves their skills, talents, and achievements.

Jobs summed it up nicely:

“Life can be much broader once you discover one simple fact: Everything around you that you call ‘life’ was made up by people that were no smarter than you. And you can change it.

The minute you understand you can change it, you can mold it … that’s maybe the most important thing: to shake off this erroneous notion that life is there and you’re just going to live in it, versus embrace it, change it, improve it …

… and make your mark upon it.”

Jobs was a mixed bag. Visionary entrepreneur, and a guy who sometimes ate only carrots or apples for a week. Incredibly influential leader, yet also the antithesis of a warm, empathetic boss.

We’re all mixed bags. At times, we’re all a little insecure. A little uncertain. A little — or a lot — messy. As Avenged Sevenfold guitarist Synyster Gates puts it, “Everyone is some sort of [screwed] up.”

Depressing? Absolutely not; that perspective is actually empowering, especially when you consider other examples.

Richard Branson’s Perspective:

Take Richard Branson. Quintessential entrepreneur. Noted philanthropist and humanitarian. World-class adventurer. Influencer of world leaders. I was nervous the first time I interviewed him, but I shouldn’t have been. He was gracious. Thoughtful. Considerate. (He even gave me half his sandwich.) Even though personal reality rarely lives up to public perception, Branson was exactly what you would hope he would be.

And then there’s this: As I was leaving, I heard him say to the PR rep, “Do you think that went OK? I’m not sure I did some of his questions justice.”

And it hit me: Even though Sir Richard is incredibly successful, intelligent, and accomplished, he’s also insecure. Just as you or I would have been, he was worried he didn’t come off well.

Additional Examples:

A few more examples? After our first interview, Metallica guitarist Kirk Hammett told me he had been nervous because he “never imagined he would ever be in a magazine like Inc.” Dany Garcia, the Rock’s business partner and CEO of the Garcia Companies, called me back after our interview, not because she wanted to change a few answers but because she was worried they lacked depth. Jack Welch paused after a question and said, “Let me think about that for a minute. I don’t want to sound dumb.”

I can list plenty more examples.

A Common Human Thread:

Why?

Because we’re all just people: No matter how talented, how celebrated, how successful or influential someone may appear on the outside, on the inside, people are just people. We all share the same doubts and fears.

That high-powered investor you’re about to pitch? She’s smart. Savvy. Successful. Naturally, you’re nervous. Even intimidated. You’re afraid your vision, your plans, your foresight, and your passion won’t be good enough.

You’re afraid you won’t be good enough.

But so is she. No matter her track record, she’s still insecure about the future: whether she can spot the next group company, the next great entrepreneur, the next great opportunity. Deep inside, she worries that she won’t be good enough.

Underneath the trappings of success is a person just as nervous and insecure as you.

Because, to paraphrase Jobs, we’re all just people — and the playing field is a lot more level than it might appear.

Embracing Our Shared Humanity:

The next time you feel nervous about meeting someone, pitching someone, selling someone, connecting with someone, make sure your nervousness isn’t misplaced. It makes sense to be nervous about how you will perform, especially if you aren’t prepared. (Confidence is all about preparation; the more prepared you are, the more confident you feel.)

But it doesn’t make sense to be nervous about the person. No matter how successful on the outside, on the inside they’re just like you: Scared. Nervous. Insecure. Messy.

Some sort of (screwed) up.

Which means you can be just as successful, in whatever way you choose to define success, as the people you admire. You can be just as successful as the people you think might be smarter, more talented, more skilled, more connected.

Because deep inside, we’re all the same.

In the best way possible.

What if a single phrase could change the course of your relationship?

The language and the words you use when you talk with your partner always matter. They are at the core of how successful your relationship is gonna be — they can literally make it or break it.

After studying 40,000 couples, psychologists Dr. John Gottman and Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman discovered the one phrase that can significantly contribute to any relationship’s success:

We all want to feel appreciated

The #1 thing we all want in our relationships is to be valued.

We want our partners to notice the things we do for them. We want our efforts to be acknowledged. We want to be seen.

A simple “thank you” can do the trick.

Making room for gratitude within a relationship builds intimacy and emotional safety. But anyone who’s ever been in a long-term relationship knows that it’s far more common to notice the things our partners do wrong instead of what they’re doing right — and vice versa.

To quote the Gottmans:

“But it’s easy to fall into the trap of only seeing what your partner is not doing. You develop a narrative where you’re the one putting in all the effort, and you start to believe it’s true.”

We take the things our partners do for us for granted

We say “thank you” when our colleague or friend brings us a cup of coffee or holds the door for us, but when our partners do the same thing, we keep our gratitude silent.

Think about all the small and thoughtful gestures you and your partner do for each other. For example, you might make a cup of tea for them every morning. They, in turn, might cook your favorite meal every time you’re feeling down.

How often do you say “thank you” to each other?

The thing is, most of us take the little things our partners do for granted and act as if saying “thank you” should be reserved for some special occasions. Over time, we even forget how important saying “thank you” really is.

And it’s really important. Research has shown that romantic partners who express gratitude are more than three times less likely to break up. Another study suggests that individuals who feel appreciated by their partners have better-functioning relationships and are more resilient to internal and external stressors.

How to open a cycle of appreciation and gratitude

When it comes to relationships, “thank you” is the most under-appreciated and under-used phrase.

Saying “thank you” to your partner is like saying “I appreciate you”. You don’t always need grand gestures or big love words to show your appreciation. Those two “humble” words work their magic.

RELATED: 5 Words That Are Infinitely More Romantic Than Saying ‘I Love You’

Here are some situations where you or your partner (probably) don’t say thank you to each other but should:

• With every little thing you do for each other (making a cup of coffee every morning, washing the dishes when it’s not one’s turn, or bringing home one’s favorite snack).
• When you receive a genuine compliment (say “thank you” instead of deflecting the praise by saying something like “oh, it’s nothing”).
• When one of you shows patience (e.g., when you run late, or when your partner is having a tantrum).
• When one of you actively listens and gives the other one their undivided attention (say “thank you for listening”).
• When you support each other, especially in times of need (say “thank you for being there with me when I was going through “X thing”).

Expressing gratitude to your partner might be the single best way to maintain a high-quality relationship.

You don’t have to go around saying thank you to each other 10 times a day, but you should say it often to make each other feel valued and appreciated.

It goes without saying that a good partner should be supportive and considerate but that doesn’t mean you should take the things they do for you for granted — and vice versa.

Every little thing one of you does for the other takes thoughtfulness, time, and energy, and none of you should ever feel your actions go unnoticed and under-appreciated.

Silent gratitude sucks. Be vocal. Say “thank you” more often. A cycle of mutual appreciation and gratitude can work wonders for your relationship.

(Margaret Pan is a freelance writer who writes to help others find love for others and themselves. This article originally appeared on YourTango)

In January of 2023, the University of Michigan National Poll on Healthy Aging (NPHA) conducted a survey involving adults aged 50 to 80 to assess their feelings of loneliness and social interactions. This study aimed to compare the results with similar surveys conducted in 2018, 2020, 2021, and 2022 to discern trends in loneliness and social engagement before and during the COVID-19 pandemic.

According to the NPHA’s latest report, 34% of adults aged 50 to 80 reported feeling isolated from others at some point in the past year. This marks a significant decrease from 56% in 2020 and a slight increase from 27% in 2018. Similarly, 37% of older adults indicated experiencing a lack of companionship in the past year, compared to 41% in 2020 and 34% in 2018.

The survey also revealed that one-third of older adults reported infrequent contact with people outside their homes in 2023. This rate was notably lower than the 46% reported in 2020, yet higher than the 28% in 2018. These findings indicated a mixed trajectory in terms of social interaction during the pandemic.

The survey identified certain factors associated with feelings of isolation, lack of companionship, and limited social contact. Those reporting fair or poor mental health, as well as poor physical health, were more likely to experience loneliness. The same was true for individuals with health issues or disabilities that affected daily activities, those not employed or retired, those living alone, and those in the 50-64 age group. Women also reported feeling lonelier than men.

Loneliness has substantial implications for mental, cognitive, and physical health, general well-being, and even longevity. Previous NPHA surveys consistently demonstrated that isolation, lack of companionship, and infrequent social contact correlated with poorer mental and physical health among older adults.

While the report showed a decline in feelings of isolation and lack of companionship among adults aged 50 to 80 in 2023, the rates were still significant. The findings emphasized that addressing loneliness requires a multifaceted approach. Similar to discussing diet and exercise, clinicians should identify older adults at higher risk of loneliness and refer them to community resources like senior centers or local libraries to promote social connections. Friends and family members are also encouraged to reconnect with older individuals who might have experienced limited contact in recent years.

The study’s results underscored the importance of tackling the issue of loneliness, which the U.S. Surgeon General has referred to as an “epidemic.” Policymakers, clinicians, and family members need to work together to combat this issue and its adverse effects on older adults’ well-being.

The data for this report were collected through a nationally representative survey conducted by NORC at the University of Chicago for the University of Michigan’s Institute for Healthcare Policy and Innovation. The survey, administered in January 2023 to adults aged 50 to 80 (n=2,563), combined online and phone methods. The sample was weighted to reflect U.S. Census Bureau figures, resulting in a completion rate of 61%. The margin of error ranged from ±1 to 3 percentage points for overall results and higher for subgroups.

It’s important to note that the findings from the National Poll on Healthy Aging do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the University of Michigan, which retains all rights over the material.

A recent study unveiled during the annual gathering of the American Society for Nutrition has pinpointed eight pivotal lifestyle factors that have the potential to significantly extend an individual’s lifespan. Drawing insights from an extensive analysis encompassing 719,147 participants enrolled in the Million Veteran Program, the research underscores the benefits of engaging in regular physical activity, cultivating robust social connections, practicing sound sleep routines, abstaining from excessive alcohol consumption, adhering to a wholesome dietary regimen, refraining from smoking, effectively managing stress levels, and steering clear of opioid dependence, all of which are correlated with a noteworthy increase in longevity.

In accordance with the study’s findings, individuals who wholeheartedly embraced all eight of these behaviors from the age of 40 onward were rewarded with a substantial boost in their lifespans, as compared to their counterparts who remained aloof from these practices. The upshot was particularly remarkable, with a remarkable lifespan augmentation of around 21 years observed among women and an even more impressive extension of 24 years among men. Furthermore, those individuals who rigorously adhered to the complete spectrum of these practices exhibited a remarkable 13% reduction in the risk of mortality during the duration of the study, in stark contrast to those who chose to forgo these habits entirely.

However, the study also underscored that there are advantages to be reaped even from the partial adoption of these behaviors, or commencing their practice subsequent to the age of 40. This underscores the study’s emphasis on the importance of inculcating these practices early on, to facilitate more favorable health outcomes as individuals age.

While all eight practices were underscored as critical pillars for fostering longevity, specific behaviors such as smoking, opioid consumption, and a sedentary lifestyle were intrinsically linked to an escalated jeopardy of untimely death. This poignant revelation underlines the need to prioritize these practices as a means to mitigate the looming threat of premature mortality.

Lending his expertise to the discourse, Dr. Patrick Coll, a distinguished geriatrician and the medical director for senior health at the esteemed University of Connecticut, accentuated the pivotal role of physical activity in the context of aging individuals. He expounded upon the manifold benefits of incorporating regular exercise routines, encompassing elements of resistance training, aerobic exercises, and exercises aimed at enhancing balance and flexibility. Such holistic physical engagement, he asserted, augments muscular strength and serves as an efficacious deterrent against potentially perilous falls.

In concurrence with its comprehensive findings, the study acknowledged that not all individuals enjoy uniform access to these propitious practices, owing to factors such as socioeconomic status, geographical location, and cultural disparities. The multifaceted inequities ingrained within society can exert a palpable impact upon an individual’s capacity to wholeheartedly embrace these transformative lifestyle shifts. Moreover, the researchers reiterated that the results gleaned from the study were of an observational nature and, thus, did not lay the foundation for causal relationships to be established with certitude.

The study’s profound insights contribute substantively to the burgeoning domain of research that endeavors to decipher the intricate nexus between lifestyle choices and the duration of one’s lifespan. Nevertheless, the researchers remain acutely aware of the imperative need for further in-depth investigations to definitively unravel the intricate tapestry of causation that underlies these associations.

Kindness is one of the most attractive qualities in a person and 41 per cent of Indian Gen Z respondents on the social networking app, Bumble, consider being unkind to strangers as a deal breaker in a relationship. Bumble also found that an overwhelming majority (76 per cent) of those surveyed stated that how they define what makes a great partner has changed dramatically over the past five years. 46 per cent of Indian respondents say that they are no longer willing to date someone who doesn’t make time for them and 44 per cent of respondents say they are no longer willing to put up with toxic behaviours.

The women-first dating app launched a global integrated campaign titled Kindness is Sexy featuring new content with actor Aditya Roy Kapur. This partnership comes at a time when singles in India are more focused on kindness as a key element of their dating decisions. According to its latest survey, an overwhelming majority (81 per cent) of respondents in India agree that kindness is sexy now more than ever before and 56 per cent of respondents value kindness over physical attributes in a potential partner.

“When we approach dating with kindness, we help create an environment of respect and compassion, and for connections to grow,” said Whitney Wolfe Herd, founder and CEO of Bumble. “Kindness is a core value here at Bumble, and we know it is the driving force behind our mission of creating healthy and equitable relationships. This new content helps redefine the idea of attraction and encourages us to never lose sight of the most valuable traits in a relationship.”

The campaign’s new film embodies this sentiment as it features popular actor, Aditya Roy Kapur exploring modern online dating as he redefines stereotypical tropes of sexy through the lens of different facets of ‘kindness’ in a relationship-respect, vulnerability to empathy. The film leverages a playful, humourous twist in the end which ultimately shows how kindness is sexy and goes a long way in making meaningful connections.

Speaking on this partnership, actor Aditya Roy Kapur shares, “At the end of the day, the heart of everything lies at being good to people around you, including your romantic relationships. I think it’s great what Bumble is doing by telling everyone, who is on their platform and whoever wants to join, that what matters is being good to each other, being accountable and responsible on the platform. By showing kindness is sexy, I think they have set the tone very clearly about the kind of interactions and the kind of people they want on the platform – I think more power to Bumble for doing that!”

IANSlife caught up with Aditya Roy Kapur to get his opinion and thoughts regarding the campaign and dating:

According to you, what are the simple acts of kindness that can make a positive impact in the dating culture these days?

Aditya: I think open communication is key in every relationship, being open to listening and understanding each other is an act of kindness. So I would say being comfortable with each other is important and expressing gratitude in any kind of relationship goes a long way too!

Any tips for your fans to make kindness a habit?

Aditya: I think whenever you think someone is doing something nice, make them know that you notice and appreciate it. It feels nice to know that someone has noticed good things that you do and good qualities, if they have been nice to you or checked in with you – let them know that you notice because it matters to them that you see them for the good.

How does it feel to associate with Bumble for Kindness is Sexy Campaign? What message do you hope to communicate through this collaboration?

Aditya: What Bumble is trying to put across is something that resonated with me. I think being kind, asking people how you like to be treated with empathy should be at the core of any healthy relationship, whichever form it may take. So, when I heard of the campaign and what its message was, I looked at it only as something that can be positive, and I felt that Bumble always goes about putting their ideas across in a fun way. I really liked the stuff that they have done for their other campaigns as well. So, it was a really exciting prospect to collaborate with them on something that I felt would be fun, interesting and also a positive message. (IANS)

Global temperatures have reached alarmingly high levels across the U.S., Europe, and Asia as heat waves set record highs this week.

Parts of European countries including most of Italy, eastern Croatia, southern Spain, southern Bosnia and Herzegovina, and Montenegro are under red alert, the European Union’s Emergency Response Coordination Centre said on Wednesday. Meanwhile, as of July 18, Phoenix had experienced 19 consecutive days of 110°F temperatures or higher. And Beijing is also experiencing a record stretch of 95°F heat.

The extreme heat comes as weather phenomenon El Niño, which occurs every two to seven years and brings higher global temperatures along the northern hemisphere, takes place. It also arrives at a critical point in global warming.

“Extreme heat events in the United States are already occurring and expected to become more common, more severe and longer lasting due to climate change,” said Claudia Brown, a health scientist at the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

Some scientists say that 2023 could be the warmest year on record, posing a problem for millions across Europe where air-conditioning is relatively rare. Only about 3% of homes in Germany and less than 5% of homes in France have an air cooling unit in their home, according to the Washington Post. That’s compared to 90% of homes in the U.S.

TIME spoke to experts about how to keep cool in your home. Here’s what they said.

Block out sunlight

The main thing to do when attempting to keep your house cool, is to block sunlight from entering the home.

“What you want to do is stop the heat before it gets through the glass or any other wall,” David Wright, a solar environmental architect, says. “You can use outside shading techniques or shades that go up and down and block sunlight at certain times of the day, or horizontal shading devices like arbors, trellises, and awnings.” Any sort of plant life that can absorb sunlight before it hits a wall is helpful, he adds.

While blocking sunlight and heat from the outside before it has a chance to enter the home—such as by having trees around your house—is the most efficient way to keep your home cool, there are tricks for people living in apartments too, says Wright, pointing to blackout curtains as a good option.

“If sunlight is allowed to come through glass into the house, once it gets inside and strikes an object,” explains Wright, “the wavelength goes from long wave to shortwave. And the short waves don’t go back through the glass. That’s what traps heat.”

Homeowners can opt for insulated glass or low-e glass—which has a thin coating that reflects heat—to prevent heat from entering the home. Applying a tint to windows in your home may also be beneficial, Miami Chief Heat Officer Jane Gilbert writes to TIME in an email statement.

Gilbert adds that residents can paint their roof a reflective white to help block out sunlight, while Wright suggests people invest in a heat pump or air conditioner to help with additional cooling.

Improving insulation in ceilings, attics, crawl spaces and even walls, will also reduce heat, according to Gilbert. Residents can also get a deal when fixing their homes as “utilities offer rebates and the IRS provides tax credits for insulation,” Gilbert tells TIME.

Use the nighttime to your advantage

If you live in a house with thermal mass (meaning it’s made of brick or concrete and retains heat well), Wright says that you can try to cool your home at night without air conditioning. He suggests homeowners take note when the outside temperature drops below the interior temperature, and then open all the windows and doors that you can.

Of course, Wright mentions, this should only be done if safety is not a concern. Low lying windows or doors are especially beneficial when doing this technique because hot air rises.

Wright also mentions that any part of your house that is built into the ground, like a basement, is going to be much cooler than other parts of your house because it is touching the surrounding earth, which is likely cooler than the air temperature. Spending time there may be optimal for cooling.

Know when a fan is efficient

Wright says that ceiling fans with large paddles, or Casablanca fans, are most helpful. “It pushes the heat up toward the ceiling and provides evaporative cooling around the body of the person,” Wright tells TIME.

Sonia Singh is the marketing communications supervisor for Maricopa County, Ariz., where Phoenix is located. There, it can get so hot that simply slipping on the concrete can lead to second-degree burns. Singh says that fans “become insufficient for cooling the air at a safe temperature” when its hotter than 90°F. At that temperature, residents without air conditioning should move to a space with air conditioning.

Know when to move to a cooling center

Brown emphasizes that air conditioning is the most efficient way of staying cool when temperatures are particularly high.

After twelve years, a lot of individuals actually seek Steve Jobs for exhortation. Seems OK: The co-founder of Apple’s perspectives on leadership, creativity, innovation, and entrepreneurship still hold up today. Great representation: Science supports Jobs’ assertion that the best managers never wanted to be managers.)

The following are five of his suggestions that have stayed with me.

On Insight

Occupations invested a ton of energy pondering the idea of insight, if by some stroke of good luck since it’s difficult to encircle yourself with savvy individuals in the event that you can’t distinguish brilliant individuals.

So what did he feel was the best sign of high insight? As Jobs said:

“A lot of it is memory. But a lot of it is the ability to zoom out, like you’re in a city and you could look at the whole thing from the 80th floor down at the city. And while other people are trying to figure out how to get from point A to point B, reading these stupid little maps, you can just see it in front of you. You can see the whole thing.

And you can make connections that seem obvious to you, because you can see the whole thing.”

Regardless of how much data you’re ready to hold, memory doesn’t be guaranteed to assist you with deciding. ( I know a lot of brilliant individuals who once in a while battle to simplify choices.)

Jobs believed that the smartest people are good at connecting with others. However, you can’t make associations except if you gather various encounters you can interface. As Jobs said:

“One of the funny things about being bright is everyone puts you on this path. To go to high school, go to college. …

[But] the key thing that comes through is they had a variety of experiences which they could draw upon in order to try to solve a problem, or attack a particular dilemma, in a unique way.

What you have to do is get different experiences. To make connections which are innovative, to connect two experiences together, you have to not have the same bag of experiences as everyone else … or you’ll make the same connections.”

Attempt new things. Discover new things. Do things that aren’t happy; That’s a sure sign that the experience, as well as the lessons you can learn from it and relate to it in the future, are unique to you.

Since it’s simple, in any event, soothing, to get familiar with something you definitely know. However at that point you’ll have something similar “pack of encounters” and make something very similar “road level” associations as every other person.

On Authority and Obligation

Nobody at any point does anything genuinely advantageous all alone. That implies we as a whole are, whether officially or casually, on occasion in a situation to lead.

Furthermore, to assume liability.

Here’s a story from John Rossman’s book Think Like Amazon:

Steve Jobs told employees a short story when they were promoted to vice president at Apple. Jobs would tell the VP that if the garbage in his office was not being emptied, Jobs would naturally demand an explanation from the janitor. “Well, the lock on the door was changed,” the janitor could reasonably respond, “and I couldn’t get a key.”

The janitor can’t do his job without a key. As a janitor, he’s allowed to have excuses.

“When you’re the janitor, reasons matter,” Jobs told his newly-minted VPs. “Somewhere between the janitor and the CEO, reasons stop mattering.

“In other words, when the employee becomes a vice president, he or she must vacate all excuses for failure. A vice president is responsible for any mistakes that happen, and it doesn’t matter what you say.”

Certain things A lot of people believe that external factors, particularly those of other people, are to blame for success or failure. Assuming I succeed, others helped me, upheld me- – others were “with” me. On the off chance that I come up short, others let me down, didn’t have confidence in me, didn’t help me- – others were “against” me.

Somewhat, that is valid. Yet in addition not absolutely inside your control.

The one and only thing you can influence? Yourself. So go about as though achievement or disappointment is absolutely inside your control: Assuming you succeed, you caused it. Assuming that you fizzle, you caused it. As Jobs would agree, “Reasons quit making a difference.”

Never rationalize. Never list reasons. And never blame others.

Except if, obviously, you point them at yourself – – and resolve that in the future, you’ll take the necessary steps to make turn out the manner in which you wish.

Regarding Perseverance If talent is the capacity to acquire a skill or knowledge more quickly than the majority of people, I definitely lack talent.

But that’s fine because, as Jobs stated:

“I’m convinced that about half of what separates successful entrepreneurs from the non-successful ones is pure perseverance. It is so hard. You pour so much of your life into this thing.

There are such rough moments… that most people give up. I don’t blame them. It’s really tough.”

Although Jobs was referring to founders of startups, the concept is generalizable. For a large portion of us, achievement depends on appearing, many days, in any event, when we would rather not.

Despite the fact that persistence is only one factor in achieving any worthwhile goal, science demonstrates that showing up every day is of utmost importance. A meta-examination distributed To Review of Educational Research found that undergrads who reliably go to class get better grades.

That may appear to be more of a correlation than a causation because the smartest people may attend class more frequently, but there is more to it. Class attendance (better predicts) college grades than any other known predictor of academic performance, including scores on standardized admissions tests such as the SAT, high school GPA, study habits, and study skills.

Results also show that class attendance explains large amounts of unique variance in college grades because of its … weak relationship with student characteristics such as conscientiousness and motivation.

Are you not particularly gifted? Not very intelligent? However long you appear, and continue to appear, you’ll probably get along nicely.

On the off chance that you don’t have an ability for deals, deals abilities can in any case be learned. Most leadership skills—giving feedback, building teams, setting expectations, showing consideration for others, seeking input, focusing on meaningful priorities, etc.—are useless if you lack the ability to lead people. can be acquired.

Progress in many pursuits doesn’t need ability. Achievement basically requires expertise and experience you can acquire.

However long you’re willing to continue to appear.

Perhaps you would rather not start your own organization, significantly less form a flourishing business. All things considered, Jobs felt everybody ought to plunge a toe in the enterprising water, regardless of whether it’s “just” a part time job.

Why? As Jobs said:

I think that without owning something — over an extended period of time, like a few years — where you have the chance to take responsibility for your recommendations, where you have to see your recommendations through all action stages, and accumulate scar tissue for the mistakes, and pick yourself up off the ground and dust yourself off, you learn a fraction of what you can. Coming in and making recommendations and not owning the results, not owning the implications, [provides] a fraction of the value and a fraction of the opportunity to learn to be better.

Without the experience of actually doing it, one never gets three-dimensional. Begin a business or a part time job and you get to diagram your own course, go with your own choices, commit your own errors, be liable for your own prosperity – – and gain from those choices, missteps, and triumphs.

Additionally, add another dimension to your life, personality, and skills.

On Money

Abundance isn’t an intermediary for insight. Also, certainly not so much for progress.

Jobs stated:

“When I was 25, my net worth was $100 million or so. I decided then that I wasn’t going to let it ruin my life. There’s no way you could ever spend it all, and I don’t view wealth as something that validates my intelligence.

My favorite things in life don’t cost any money.”

Simple to say when you’re valued at $100 million, yet at the same time. While money does a ton of things – – one of the most significant is to make decisions – – after a specific point, research shows cash doesn’t make individuals more joyful.

Jobs set his sights on earning a living doing what he loved. It’s up to you to decide what constitutes a “living,” but once you’ve achieved that level of financial success, you should put in a lot of effort to include at least some of the “love what you do” component.

Because if you do that, you’ll be living the life you want.

As President of Microsoft, Bill Doors had a pressed timetable — in any event, sending 2:00 a.m. solicitations to workers. Gates didn’t realize how to be kind to himself and his staff until he looked at the personal daybook of Berkshire Hathaway CEO Warren Buffett.

“I had consistently pressed, and I felt that was the main way you could get things done,” Entryways told writer Charlie Rose in a meeting with Buffett in 2017. “[ I] recollect Warren showing me his schedule … he [still] has days that there’s nothing on it.”

Buffett’s sparser timetable showed Entryways a significant example: ” You control your time … It’s anything but an intermediary of your reality that you fill consistently in your timetable. I can purchase anything I need, essentially, yet I can’t delay,” Buffett added.

Science actually supports Buffett’s strategy, which is essentially “work smarter, not harder.” Laborers’ capability steeply declines when they work over 50 hours out of each week, a 2014 Stanford College concentrate on found.

Individuals who stir as long as 70 hours seven days get a similar measure of work done as the people who slouch over their PCs for 55 hours, the examination uncovered.

That lesson hasn’t just been hard for Gates’ CEO. For instance, Tesla CEO Elon Musk revealed to CNBC’s David Faber in May that he now sleeps at least six hours per night. Musk had previously stated that he frequently worked all-nighters to get to work. “I’ve tried [to sleep] less, but… even though I’m awake more hours, I get less done,” Musk stated. What’s more, the cerebrum torment level is terrible in the event that I get under six hours [of rest for each night].”

For some, getting there might be difficult. It took Doors years to find a solid balance between serious and fun activities, he said in a new beginning discourse at Northern Arizona College.

I didn’t take vacations when I was your age. I didn’t trust in ends of the week. Gates stated, “I didn’t think the people I worked with should either.”

He continued, “Don’t wait as long as I did to learn this lesson.” Take your time to nurture your relationships, recoup from your losses, and rejoice in your accomplishments. Whenever you need to, take a break. Resist the urge to stress about individuals around you when they need it, as well.”

While possessing the correct answers is crucial, success can also be attained by posing the right questions. As Gates stated:

Ever since I was a teenager, I’ve tackled every big new problem the same way: by starting off with two questions. I used this technique at Microsoft, and I still use it today. I ask these questions literally every week about Covid-19.

Here they are: Who has dealt with this problem well? And what can we learn from them?

In essence, this encapsulates Gates’ approach. When attempting to tackle a significant problem or reach a substantial goal, avoid spending time trying to create something new from scratch. Instead, look for an excellent existing solution that can be adapted to your needs. Seek out individuals who have successfully resolved the issue or achieved the objective. Begin with the end in mind – the resolution or accomplishment – and work your way back.

This method serves as a great equalizer since it doesn’t require you to be exceptionally creative, intelligent, connected, educated, or wealthy. All that’s needed is the willingness to search, examine, and follow the steps and processes discovered. The best part is that you’ll embark on this journey with confidence – rather than hope – that your efforts will produce results.

As the saying goes, “what works for others can definitely work for you.”

Bill Gates on Using Your Time Wisely

Warren Buffett once remarked, “The difference between successful people and really successful people is that really successful people say no to almost everything.” Gates shares a similar perspective:

He recalls Warren showing him his calendar, which had many empty slots. Gates used to believe that filling every minute was the only way to be productive. However, he realized that being cautious with time and allowing for days with nothing on the schedule meant that “sitting and thinking may be a much higher priority.”

Gates emphasizes that a packed schedule is not an indicator of your commitment or effectiveness; it simply makes you busy.

If you find yourself struggling to achieve your goals, take a step back and identify what truly matters and drives results. In most cases, the key factor isn’t you, so don’t assume your presence is indispensable in every meeting or call.

Remember, an overbooked calendar might be preventing you from attaining the success you aspire to and rightfully deserve.

Bill Gates on Being a Good Leader

During Microsoft’s early years, Gates utilized his remarkable memory to monitor the hours employees worked by memorizing their license plates. He would check the parking lot to see when they arrived and left. Given that Gates worked weekends and “didn’t believe in vacations,” this approach is not too surprising.

However, Gates eventually recognized that focusing on results was more important and a better use of his time as a leader. He also learned to adjust his expectations, particularly in terms of patience. As Gates mentioned:

Patience is an essential component of success, particularly for leaders.

Reflect on the most exceptional boss you’ve ever had. You were inspired to perform your best because you knew they cared about and believed in you, and you didn’t want to disappoint them.

One of the most effective ways to demonstrate to your employees that you care and have faith in their abilities is by exercising patience. When you display patience and convey genuine confidence, your team members will naturally be driven to discover methods to accomplish tasks that astonish everyone – themselves included.

Navigating relationships can often appear more complex than necessary. We find ourselves questioning whether our partner is “the one” and if perfection can be sustained. However, reality doesn’t always meet our expectations. When issues arise, the feeling of being overwhelmed or lost in love can set in. To address this, you might explore scientific research, seek counseling, or sift through myriad relationship advice, trying to find something valuable.

The sheer volume of information can be daunting, making inaction seem like the best option. While doing nothing may provide temporary relief, it won’t lead to lasting improvements in your relationship. The good news? Enhancing your relationship is actually simpler than you think, boiling down to just three fundamental strategies.

Take Initiative People who adopt the “take initiative” approach tackle problems head-on. If this sounds like you, it’s difficult for you to sit idly by. Instead, you’re eager to take action and invest time and energy into resolving issues. You prefer being proactive, anticipating potential hurdles and addressing them before they become major concerns. As Nicholas Sparks penned in The Notebook, “So, it’s not gonna be easy. It’s gonna be really hard. We’re gonna have to work at this every day…” Embrace the effort; it’s a natural part of building a strong relationship. Here are some ways to take initiative:

• The four-hour commitment:

Enhancing your relationship doesn’t need to be time-consuming. With 168 hours in a week, allocate just four to prioritizing your relationship. To maximize the impact, plan date nights with “N.I.C.E.” activities—those that are “new, interesting, challenging, and exciting.” Studies indicate that couples who engage in such activities together enjoy better relationships (Aron et al., 2022).

• Develop relationship skills: Use some of those four hours to improve your relationship skills. Key areas to focus on include communication, conflict resolution, understanding your partner, self-awareness, life management, stress management, and sexual/romantic skills (Epstein et al., 2013). Most of these skills involve self-improvement, making them easier to implement without your partner’s assistance. And since there’s always room for growth, revisiting these skills is beneficial. Research suggests that honing these abilities leads to a healthier relationship.
• Be more adventurous in bed: Here’s an enjoyable suggestion: increasing sexual variety can boost arousal and desire (Morton & Gorzalka, 2015). Greater desire and arousal lead to improved sexual satisfaction by combating monotony and boredom, ultimately reducing the likelihood of infidelity. It’s a win-win situation.

Lower Expectations

If adding more to your already busy life seems unattainable, consider wanting less instead of doing more. This doesn’t mean discarding all your standards; rather, adjust your expectations to be more realistic and appreciate what is sufficient.

The “lower expectations” approach appeals to those who understand that their perception of their partner’s actions or their relationship rules affects their happiness. For instance, viewing occasional moodiness as a deal-breaker or believing that happy couples don’t argue is counterproductive. As Hamlet said, “…there is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.” The issue might not be the relationship itself, but your perspective. Educating yourself about healthy relationships can help.

• Soulmate myth: While romance is important in a relationship, believing in soulmates can impose nearly impossible standards on your partner. No one is truly flawless. Soulmates are thought to be your perfect match, the person you’re destined to be with (Knee & Petty, 2013). When your partner inevitably falls short, doubts arise. You may question whether you’re in the right relationship or if your partner is the right person for you. Let go of these impossible standards.
• Manage expectations: In the film Up in the Air, Anna Kendrick’s character, Natalie, has a highly specific list of qualities she wants in a partner and claims, “I just don’t want to settle.” Vera Farmiga’s character, Alex, explains that not ticking every box on a wishlist isn’t a failure. However, unrealistic expectations will always disappoint, setting both your partner and your relationship up for failure. Instead, lower your expectations by recognizing that neither you nor your partner is perfect. Excessively high expectations and constant dissatisfaction can prevent you from appreciating your amazing partner.
• Avoid searching for problems: Even with properly adjusted expectations, you might still be overly critical of your partner and relationship. Our natural negativity bias encourages us to focus on negative aspects (Rozin & Royzman, 2001). This can lead to “problemicity” or identifying problems where none exist. Research suggests that when your relationship lacks significant issues, you tend to overemphasize smaller ones (Levari et al., 2018). One way to lower expectations is by not creating drama or seeking out problems.

However, don’t disregard all your standards. Lowering expectations too much can lead to unhappiness. Find a balance with reasonable and realistic expectations.

Appreciate What You Have Sometimes the best solutions are the simplest. If you struggle to find time to “do more” and you have fair expectations, consider adopting the easiest strategy: cherish your current relationship. As Alan Kay said, “A change of perspective is worth 80 IQ points.” It’s time to gain wisdom about your love life.

• Be grateful: Improving your relationship could be as simple as expressing gratitude for what you already have. Acknowledge everything that is easy, comfortable, uncomplicated, stable, and predictable in your relationship. We often take these fundamental building blocks for granted, but they are crucial to success. Expressing gratitude for these positive aspects can enhance relationship quality (Algoe et al., 2013).
• Celebrate the positives: Take your appreciation a step further by emphasizing the good parts even more. Researchers call this “capitalization,” which involves savoring good news and positive moments in a relationship to boost individual well-being and self-esteem (Gable & Reis, 2010). Capitalization also increases closeness, satisfaction, intimacy, and commitment in the relationship. Remember, healthy relationships typically have more positives than negatives – just take the time to notice them.
• Embrace positive illusions: You might worry that your partner and relationship aren’t as great as you perceive them to be. What if you’re wrong or deceiving yourself? Surprisingly, holding positive illusions, or viewing your relationship as better than it is, can actually benefit the relationship (Murray et al., 1996). Our overly generous assessments give our partners a goal to strive for, encouraging self-improvement (e.g., “My partner thinks I’m really wonderful, so I better make sure I am so they’re not disappointed.”), which ultimately benefits the relationship.

What’s the Ideal Approach? So, which of these three strategies should you choose? The best one is the one you’re most likely to put into practice. Your personal problem-solving preference will determine the ideal approach.

• If you’re proactive and driven, take initiative.
• Are you somewhat critical, judgmental, or demanding? Lower your expectations.
• If you believe stepping back and reassessing is necessary, focus on appreciating what you have.

Select the strategy that allows you to get started immediately. Once you begin implementing it, you’ll create positive momentum that can be utilized to incorporate other techniques. Feel free to mix and match or stick with the one that works best for you. What truly matters is that you’re actively working to enhance your relationship. Its future is too valuable to do anything less.

Residing in The Hague, I am surrounded by 11 kilometers of stunning coastline that features picturesque dunes and sandy shores. During summer, it’s common to find locals at Scheveningen or Kijkduin, the city’s most popular beaches, basking in the sun, taking leisurely walks, or cycling before settling on one of the many benches available. They might be reading, conversing with friends, or simply engaging in the act of niksen.

Niksen, a Dutch wellness trend translating to “doing nothing,” gained global attention in 2019 as a method for managing stress and recovering from burnout. At that time, many people were seeking relief from fatigue and depression caused by overwork, leading to the adoption of concepts like Japanese ikigai or Danish hygge. As a linguist, I appreciated how the idea of doing nothing could be conveyed in a single, easy-to-pronounce word.

In my book, Niksen: Embracing the Dutch Art of Doing Nothing, I describe it as “doing nothing without a purpose” – not mindlessly scrolling through Facebook or meditating. While mindfulness focuses on being present in the moment, niksen is about setting aside time to simply exist, allowing your mind to wander freely. In our post-pandemic world, reevaluating how we work and utilize our time is crucial.

From a linguistic standpoint, the verb “niksen” (doing nothing) is derived from “niks,” meaning “nothing.” According to Monique Flecken, a psycholinguist at the University of Amsterdam, “It fits with the tendency of the Dutch language to create verbs out of nouns,” such as “voetbal” (football) becoming “voetballen” (playing football), or “internet” turning into “internetten.” She adds, “The Dutch are a practical, direct people and their language reflects that.”

In the Netherlands, niksen can have both positive and negative connotations. Flecken explains that a parent might ask their child, “Zit je weer te niksen?” (Are you doing nothing again?), while someone might also say “lekker niksen,” translating to “delicious doing nothing,” when referring to an evening blissfully devoid of tasks or work.

Psychologist and author Thijs Launspach defines niksen as “doing nothing or occupying yourself with something trivial as a way of enjoying your own time.” He notes that this concept is more applicable to older individuals with unstructured free time, whereas younger generations in the Netherlands – a country known for its work-life balance – are more stressed than ever.

Launspach attributes this stress to various factors: “Our lives and our jobs have become increasingly complex. We tend to spend a lot of time with computers. There is a lot of pressure on being the best version of yourself, be it in our jobs, or the expectations of parents [or] from social media. There is a lot of pressure to perform.”

Stress, as Bernet Elzinga, a psychology professor at Leiden University, points out, isn’t always detrimental. “It’s not necessarily bad to be for a moment in a state of stress, where you’re really on and focused. The problem is when this is getting out of hand,” she remarked. However, niksen can offer a solution by allowing the mind to wander and reflect, connecting us to our default mode network.

Interestingly, engaging in niksen can boost productivity, as taking breaks enables our brains to rest and refocus. This might explain why the Dutch, despite not working long hours, are highly efficient at work. In the Netherlands, the prevailing attitude is “just be normal, that’s already crazy enough,” discouraging overtime and reflecting the country’s honest and egalitarian culture.

This approach appears to be effective, as the Dutch are renowned for their creativity and innovation – from famous painters like Rembrandt, Vermeer, and Escher to inventive flood control measures like massive dams and floating houses.

The Dutch also value enjoyment, as evidenced by the word lekker, meaning “delicious,” but applicable to anything pleasant, such as lekker warm, lekker slapen, and lekker niksen. Their focus on leisure makes it easier for people to do nothing more effortlessly. Locals often spend their time actively, cycling or hiking, and flocking to cafes and terraces whenever the sun emerges, even in winter. These spaces are ideal for practicing niksen.

However, Launspach remains skeptical of using niksen as a stress prevention strategy. “I’m a little bit skeptical of the idea that you should create a buffer between you and stress. I don’t know if that’s even possible in the way that we live and work now,” he stated. Elzinga, on the other hand, believes engaging in physical activity in nature is a better way to distract from daily concerns.

Fortunately, the Netherlands offers opportunities to combine niksen, nature, and movement. The Dutch cherish their limited natural areas, with many dune spaces forming part of an extensive network of hiking and cycling routes across the country. Even in larger cities like Rotterdam, The Hague, or Amsterdam, trails are never too far away.

In collaboration with the Dutch Railway system, Wandelnet has developed NS Wandelingen, a series of easily accessible hiking routes via public transport. With distances ranging from 7 to 22 kilometers, these routes are perfect for day trips, and the numerous benches along the way provide opportunities for niksen breaks.

The Dutch can enjoy such leisure time thanks to their excellent welfare system and balance between hard work and ample days off. “Having a good social support system, having lower stress level relates to feeling secure and in balance. So, I wouldn’t overestimate the importance of that,” said Elzinga. Given the ongoing global challenges – the Covid-19 pandemic and the war in Ukraine – stress relief is more vital than ever.

Arguably, the most crucial aspect you can bring to your relationship is being conscious of your own emotions. Equally important is understanding your partner’s feelings. To say that these skills are essential for a couple’s well-being and happiness would be a massive understatement.

Even with awareness of your relationship’s emotions, what should you do with this knowledge? This is where communication skills come into play. How do you express to your partner that they’ve angered or hurt you? How can you convey your needs to them? As most couples therapists know, “The way you communicate a difficult message is even more important than the message itself.”

Let’s examine examples of unsuccessful communication.

Ineffective Communication Examples

Mark is upset and angry because Beth didn’t pay attention to him at a party, even after he asked her to stay by his side since he didn’t know anyone.

1. Passive-aggressive: Mark decides, “I’ll show her how it feels. I’ll ignore her at my work party next week.”
2. Aggressive: Mark approaches Beth during the party and quietly, but furiously, says, “You are so self-centered! I’m never going to another party with you again.”
3. Sarcastic: As soon as they get in the car to drive home, Mark angrily says, “Well, I hope you had fun at that party because I sure didn’t.”

Passive-Aggressive

Passive-aggressive actions are more about retaliation than communication. Mark believes his tit-for-tat approach will teach Beth a lesson, but it won’t. When Mark ignores Beth at his work party, it’s likely that she’ll never link his behavior to her own. Even if she does, resentment will follow. This method only burdens the relationship with negativity over time.

Aggressive

In this example, Mark uses an accusatory and confrontational approach, with poor timing. His words, tone, and decision to confront her during the party guarantee that Beth won’t want to fix the issue. Instead, she’ll feel attacked, hurt, and potentially humiliated. Sadly, Mark’s needs will remain unaddressed.

Sarcastic

Here, Mark waits until it’s too late for Beth to correct her behavior in the moment. He doesn’t communicate his feelings directly or considerately. Sarcasm is like “a jab that comes at you from the side.” Beth will feel accused and attacked, raising her defenses. Consequently, Mark’s message will be lost.

If you see yourself or your partner in these examples, it’s likely that neither of you learned effective communication skills growing up. As a therapist specializing in childhood emotional neglect, I’ve observed that many couples’ communication is heavily influenced by their upbringing.

Some families openly and directly address emotions and are comfortable discussing problems. Others are deeply uncomfortable or entirely oblivious to their members’ feelings. Emotionally neglectful families fail to teach their children essential emotional communication skills required for a happy marriage.

If you or your partner were raised in an emotionally neglectful family, there’s a high chance your marriage suffers from a lack of communication skills. This can be frustrating and divisive, but there’s another lesser-known negative result: your messages, feelings, and needs go unheard, and thus, unfulfilled.

Good Communication Skills Examples

Consider the same scenario where Mark feels hurt and angry because Beth disregarded him at a party, even after he requested her to stay with him since he was unfamiliar with the crowd.

1. At the party, Mark gently places his hand on Beth’s shoulder and whispers in her ear, “Don’t forget, I don’t know anyone here. Please remember to stay with me.”
2. As they drive home, Mark calmly asks, “Beth, I thought we agreed to stick together at the party tonight. What happened?”

In the first instance, Mark’s communication is spot-on. He conveys his needs to Beth while still at the party, giving her the chance to rectify the situation. His approach is non-confrontational, as he merely reminds her. This way, he not only assumes she isn’t deliberately ignoring him but also encourages her to address the issue.

In the second example, although Beth cannot fix the problem during the party, Mark still communicates in a non-accusatory and non-aggressive manner.

Posing questions is an excellent method for avoiding blame and allowing your partner to explain their actions. It also fosters open discussion rather than inciting an angry or defensive reaction. Remember, “the moment your partner’s defenses are up, you lose their capacity to attend to your feelings or needs.”

The Greatest Benefit of Effective Communication

Effective communication skills offer numerous advantages. They facilitate honesty within the relationship and continuously deepen your understanding of one another—even after 20 years together.

As with poor communication skills, there’s another crucial aspect that most people overlook: when you express yourself appropriately, your partner is more likely to listen, increasing the chances of getting your wants and needs met.

If you or your partner were raised in an emotionally neglectful family and didn’t have the opportunity to learn effective communication skills, it’s essential to know that it’s never too late. As long as you’re willing to learn, you can acquire these skills and even pass them on to your children.

What differentiates successful people from others in social situations? The answer might be simpler than anticipated: habits. Adopting the right habits can lead to success in business and life, while letting go of harmful ones can help overcome challenges. To achieve greater success, learn from those who have already found it by emulating their habits and identifying any personal behaviors that might hinder your progress. In this article, we’ll discuss key habits that successful individuals avoid in social settings, providing a clear path for personal growth and achievement.

1.They Never Put Anyone Down

The journey to success can sometimes be lonely, especially if what we consider accomplishments aren’t widely recognized. Truly successful people understand this and develop empathy for those striving to succeed. Rejections and obstacles can be disheartening, but knowing that their efforts are appreciated by some can keep them going. Successful people are aware of the struggles involved in reaching the top, so they always advocate for fair treatment. They never intentionally demean anyone in public; instead, they elevate and uplift others’ spirits, encouraging them to keep going.

2. They Don’t Conform Just to Fit In

Successful individuals know how to adapt in social situations without conforming to ideas that conflict with their values. They consistently align with their core values, embracing authenticity and simplicity while overcoming challenges and expectations. If successful people stopped pursuing their passions after listening to naysayers, they wouldn’t become pioneers in their industries. For them, external validation is appreciated but not necessary for achieving success. Their priority is following their convictions, even if they’re in the minority.

3. They Don’t Tolerate Disrespect

Truly successful people recognize their worth and refuse to let others disrespect them. Their strong sense of self-respect enables them to distance themselves from situations or individuals who fail to appreciate and value them as they deserve. Disrespect in social settings can manifest in various ways, from subtle to blatant actions or words. However, instead of creating a scene, successful people handle confrontations gracefully. They maintain professionalism but always communicate their feelings and reasons for taking offense.

4.They Never Claim Perfection

Genuinely successful individuals understand that achieving perfection is impossible, and as such, they don’t pretend to be perfect. Maintaining a faultless exterior can be draining, as “it’s easy to slip up and make mistakes.” Society’s concept of perfection is so restrictive that those perceived as perfect often fear taking risks or stepping outside their comfort zones. Successful people acknowledge that certain factors, like the actions of others, are beyond their control. Instead of fretting over things that don’t go according to plan, they concentrate on what they can influence. They never feign perfection and consistently accept responsibility for their failures, rather than burdening themselves with stress and blaming those around them.

5.They Don’t Overcompensate

Successful individuals never feel compelled to overcompensate, as they possess a natural confidence based on a firm grasp of their own identity. They understand that their best efforts are sufficient for any given situation. Moreover, successful people recognize that overcompensation often arises from a need to hide personal deficiencies. With a strong faith in their own abilities, however, they have no reason to disguise any perceived shortcomings. This self-confidence enables them to concentrate on their objectives without succumbing to the pressure to overcompensate. Defining one’s own vision of success is essential – successful people clearly comprehend what accomplishment means to them, which eliminates the urge to overcompensate or overachieve. While they have a guiding compass directing them towards their goals, they’re not impervious to insecurities and failures. Nevertheless, they refuse to allow setbacks to define them or hinder their pursuits, maintaining focus and resilience in the face of adversity.

6.They Always Celebrate Their Achievements

For successful individuals, reaching their current position required a long and challenging journey. Many might have considered giving up along the way, but various motivations and milestones kept them going – which is why it’s crucial for them to consistently celebrate every victory. “Celebrating small wins gives us a feeling of pride and happiness that keeps us working towards bigger goals.” This sentiment is particularly true when others join in the celebration. However, celebrating achievements in social situations doesn’t grant people the right to be boastful or arrogant. Successful people do so because they’re genuinely proud of their accomplishments and wish to share their positivity, not because they want to feel superior to others.

7.They Always Listen to Others

While successful people have a clear sense of their goals, they also appreciate the significance of listening to others – even if it proves challenging at first. They never neglect to listen because they recognize that their ideas may not always be the best – others might have more valuable insights or methods for achieving a shared objective. Effective listening involves more than simply allowing others to speak; it also requires giving full attention and resisting the urge to react defensively. “If you start listening closely to what others have to say, then it’s easier to gain their trust and respect.”

1. They Always Prioritize Their Friends

Successful individuals understand when to accept requests and invitations, but they also recognize when it’s appropriate to decline. They develop the skill of discerning when to say no over time. These people always make time for their loved ones, ensuring they never cancel plans. Highly successful individuals avoid flaking on others by not overcommitting themselves. They enjoy spending quality time with important people in their lives while also setting boundaries and prioritizing self-care. Success, in their eyes, involves choosing whom to say no to. Effective time management allows them to strike a balance between pursuing their passions and bonding with loved ones.

1. They Seize Every Opportunity

Highly successful individuals believe that valuable lessons can be found in the most unexpected places. They are confident in their ability to handle any opportunity that comes their way. Many people struggle with self-doubt and impostor syndrome, but successful individuals set themselves apart with their unwavering faith in their own capabilities. Instead of being intimidated by significant opportunities, they confidently embrace them, understanding that even failure provides essential learning experiences. Successful people approach every situation as a chance for growth and improvement.

1. They Don’t Expect Too Much Too Soon

While successful people do their best to help those around them, they also acknowledge that they are not responsible for meeting everyone’s needs. They believe in earning their success and never anticipate handouts or unearned favors from others. When it comes to offering assistance, they are more than willing to return the support they’ve received during their times of need. Appreciative of the aid they’ve been given, they often form lasting friendships with those who have supported them, cultivating a network of caring, uplifting connections.

1. They Avoid “Humble Bragging”

Humble bragging is a way of boasting that thinly disguises arrogance with a semblance of humility. Successful people understand that humble bragging is irritating and toxic behavior, so they exercise restraint in their choice of words and tone. They don’t embellish their stories with exaggerations or false details to make them seem more impressive than they are. Their friends and family members take pride in their accomplishments, ensuring that their achievements are recognized and celebrated without the need for humble bragging.

1. They Never Pretend to Know It All

Successful individuals never claim to have all the answers, especially when their knowledge on a subject is limited. Rather than speaking thoughtlessly, they listen attentively to others and strive to learn from them. Many people lack the intellectual humility to admit their ignorance and seek help, often because they perceive it as a sign of weakness. However, successful individuals recognize that listening to those who possess greater expertise is crucial for achieving their goals. They understand that admitting what they don’t know is perfectly acceptable, as there is always room for growth and improvement.

Small habits can often bring about substantial changes in our lives. Incorporating easy yet impactful practices into our everyday routines can lead to enduring self-improvement and transformation. In this article, we delve into six minor habits that can alter your life for the better when consistently applied.

Write Down Your Goals

The initial habit to embrace is recording your objectives. “When you put your aspirations on paper, they become more concrete,” serving as visible, solid reminders of what you want to accomplish. Writing down your goals helps to engrave them in your memory, making it simpler to concentrate on achieving them.

To establish practical objectives, think about using the SMART criteria, which stands for Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound. By setting SMART goals, monitoring your progress and maintaining motivation becomes easier. With your written goals, you can “refer to them regularly,” supplying you with continuous motivation and guidance.

Establish Systems for Goal Achievement

Although goal-setting is essential, it’s equally important to develop systems that support their realization. A goal signifies the desired result, while a system represents the process leading you there. Having a systematic approach to attaining goals reduces the chances of being sidetracked by unexpected obstacles or distractions.

For instance, if you aim to lose 10 pounds within three months, a potential system could include regular exercise, meal planning, and monitoring your daily calorie consumption. By concentrating on the system rather than the outcome, you can maintain constant effort and enhance your chances of success.

Implementing and sustaining systems necessitates discipline, organization, and occasional reevaluation. Regularly assess your systems’ effectiveness and make adjustments to guarantee ongoing progress.

Apply the Pareto Principle to Prioritize Important Tasks

The Pareto Principle, or the 80/20 rule, implies that roughly 80% of results stem from 20% of efforts. Utilizing this principle in various aspects of your life enables you to concentrate on the most crucial tasks, ensuring that your energy is channeled toward activities with the most significant outcomes.

To effectively employ the Pareto Principle, start by identifying and prioritizing the most vital tasks in your personal and professional life. Focusing on these high-impact activities can lead to “meaningful progress toward your goals” while preventing the risk of overextending yourself.

Learn to Say No

Developing the ability to be selective with your commitments is one of the most influential habits you can cultivate. By declining things that don’t align with your objectives or values, you make room for activities that truly matter.

Establishing boundaries is crucial for maintaining equilibrium and focus in your life. Mastering the art of saying no without causing offense or straining relationships is essential. Practice assertive and transparent communication, and keep in mind that it’s often better to turn down an invitation or request than to overcommit and disappoint others or yourself.

Saying no to the right things can result in heightened focus and productivity, ultimately enabling you to accomplish more in less time.

Treat Time as Your Most Precious Asset

Time is a finite resource that cannot be regained once spent. When you acknowledge the true value of your time, you’re more likely to make choices that mirror your priorities and bring you closer to your goals.

To effectively utilize your time, devise methods for managing and monitoring it. Consider using tools like calendars, planners, and time-tracking apps to stay organized and maintain oversight of your schedule. Set aside time for crucial tasks and ensure you have enough downtime for relaxation and rejuvenation. Periodically evaluate how you use your time and adjust as necessary to maximize this invaluable resource.

Improve a Little Each Day

The notion of continuous improvement highlights the power of small, incremental changes. Rather than aiming for huge leaps forward, concentrate on making daily progress in various aspects of your life, such as health, relationships, and career. Over time, these minor adjustments can accumulate, leading to significant transformation.

To integrate daily improvement into your routine, begin by identifying areas where you want to grow. Next, establish attainable micro-goals that can be addressed each day. For instance, if you want to enhance your fitness, commit to doing ten minutes of exercise daily, gradually increasing the duration or intensity as you become stronger.

Consistency is the key to continuous improvement. Consciously engage in daily activities that promote growth and progress, creating a positive feedback loop that fuels your motivation and reinforces your commitment to change.

Inspirational stories of people who have transformed their lives through small, consistent changes serve as powerful reminders of what can be achieved when we concentrate on daily improvement. Embrace the potential of incremental progress, and you might accomplish more than you ever imagined.

Conclusion

The six habits examined in this article – recording goals, establishing systems for goal achievement, applying the Pareto Principle, learning to say no, valuing time, and pursuing daily improvement – can bring about lasting change when consistently practiced. As you begin your journey toward enduring transformation, remember these habits and commit to incorporating them into your everyday routine.

Change is rarely easy, but with perseverance, determination, and a focus on these minor habits, you can create a life that is more satisfying and more aligned with your values and ambitions. Keep in mind that small, consistent steps lead to major transformations. Start today and harness the power of small habits to change your life forever.

Despite global issues such as the cost-of-living crisis, climate change, and mass shootings, people remain obsessed with happiness. Happiness has become a central focus in modern society, with terms like “Chief Happiness Officer,” the Happy Planet Index, and the World Happiness Report emphasizing its importance. However, despite this, people are often unhappy, with millions suffering from depression and anxiety worldwide.

Happiness has long been seen as a goal and a reward for hard work, even by ancient Greek philosophers like Socrates. However, the positive thinking movement and abundance theory have made it seem like happiness is the primary objective that people can achieve if they try hard enough. However, the phenomenon of affective forecasting shows that people often misjudge what will make them happy, leading to disappointment.

Amidst this confusion, it’s worth asking whether happiness is the right goal to pursue. Instead, what if people pursued wonder, an emotion as universal as happiness and fear? Wonder can make people feel like a small part of a bigger system, which can make their problems seem smaller too. Negative emotions like sadness and fear shouldn’t be avoided, as they contribute to a more profound sense of well-being. Psychologist and philosopher Kirk Schneider calls happiness “potential fool’s gold” and warns against toxic positivity, which can be just as harmful as negative thinking.

Embracing negative emotions and emotional granularity, or emodiversity, can help people broaden their emotional vocabulary, which makes them more resilient. Co-activation, holding positive and negative emotions in one’s mind simultaneously, is also a powerful coping mechanism that increases people’s sense of meaning and gratitude in the face of adversity. Bittersweetness, sympathy, nostalgia, and wonder are mixed or “dually valenced” emotions that can have positive effects.

During times of stress, people often lean on simple emotions like happiness or sadness instead of embracing complex emotions like wonder. However, complex emotions make people more resilient and help them metabolize traumatic experiences. In one study, widows and widowers who recalled both positive and negative elements of their deceased spouses were better able to manage their grief. Author Susan Cain describes mixed emotions as “some of the most sublime aspects of being human,” connected to our appreciation of how fragile life can be.

In conclusion, it’s important to question whether happiness is the right goal to pursue. Wonder and mixed emotions like bittersweetness, nostalgia, and wonder can provide people with more profound well-being and resilience. By embracing complex emotions, people can better metabolize traumatic experiences and find meaning in them.

When it comes to trusting someone, certain traits help in establishing a sense of reliance. From honesty to accountability, here is a list of qualities often found among trustworthy people:

Honesty:

Signs that someone may not be entirely honest are difficulty making eye contact, nervous body language, and changing stories.

Reliability:

Consistency and following through on commitments indicate reliability. From being punctual to meeting deadlines without fail, trusted people remain dependable when called upon.

Consistency:

Unexpected changes in behavior and decision-making can pose as a warning sign – if you’re looking for someone to trust it’s best to observe their consistency across various scenarios over time.

Responsibility:

Taking initiative and dealing with problems before they arise sets responsible people apart from those who cannot be trusted, as they will always take ownership of their actions rather than shifting blame onto others.

Integrity:

Moral and ethical principles create an internal compass ensuring decisions will be made justly regardless of any external influences – making these people good role models for others to learn from.

Transparency:

By being open about thoughts, feelings, and intentions transparency creates a level of trustworthiness due to the knowledge that you’re never in the dark about how another person truly feels or what is really going on within them.

Loyalty:

Whether we’re talking about friendship or romantic relationships, loyalty is essential for another person to be considered trustworthy – staying committed even when times get tough or shinier alternatives come along!

Accountability:

In line with taking responsibility for their actions, accountable people are willing to face consequences if things do not go according to plan while also learning from mistakes so they don’t repeat them in the future as well as happily taking glory when success is achieved.

Empathy:

Having empathy means being able to understand how one feels and put yourself in their shoes – leading towards more favorable outcomes when another can identify with your experience at a human level instead of acting solely based on logic.

Confidentiality:

When confiding in someone any violation of secrecy shows lack of trustworthiness which applies both personally or within the workplace context where sensitive information needs protection from gossip or loose lips!

One of the surprising ways to boost energy and happiness is through the sense of smell. Every time one indulges in a lovely scent, it ties them to the present, with a feeling of being transported into the past. Scent memories can be powerful, prompting a person to remember the most loving moments of their past. Enjoying lovely fragrances helps people recall happy times. “With a scent, you can’t bookmark it, rewind it, stockpile it, or save it for later. It ties you the present moment,” says the author in the book.

Utilize Your Sense of Touch to Alleviate Stress

Another sense that people can tap into to calm their anxious selves is the sense of touch. Holding something cuddly and warm can be comforting in anxiety-ridden situations, such as medical facilities. “My aunt works in palliative care, and they recently put in a big order of light, cuddly throws. It’s comforting for people to touch something soft and warm,” the author explains. Similarly, the author has her way of using touch to address anxiety-ridden situations involving public speaking. She says, “I hold a pen when I’m in a situation that makes me anxious, like being backstage before giving a big talk.”

Boost your focus and productivity by harnessing the power of sound

Those distracted and feeling unproductive can use their sense of sound to help focus. One way to address the challenge of controlling the surroundings is to take breaks from enclosed spaces in a quieter and more serene atmosphere. For instance, one could work in a coffee shop or similar bustling environment while secluding oneself to a private space at the library or other areas designated to promote quiet workspaces.

Boost your creativity with your sense of sight

On the other hand, those seeking to boost their creative inspirations can use their sense of sight. Rather than getting lost in thought during a walk, the author suggests looking for small details. For example, during the daily walks, find small details such as colors, tree types, or materials on buildings. Notably, the author advises looking closer each day for the more beauty and surprises that likely exist. The author gained insights into mismatched details on a street she had walked on hundreds of times before.

Want to feel more connected to people? Tap into your sense of taste

Lastly, for those seeking to connect better with others, she recommends using taste. Sharing unique foods and flavors brings people together, as it is an ancient human custom. In creating shared sensory experiences, people loosen up and feel closer. Thus, the author organized a “Taste Party” event where her guests examined various flavors and rated them. They explored the five basic tastes of sweet, sour, salty, bitter, and umami, asked each other about childhood candy, and continually laughed throughout the evening. It was a tremendous experience, made their conversations feel unusually warm and intimate.

The five senses can help people to live healthier, happier, and more fulfilled lives. The author’s journey to find ways to enhance the quality of life led to her inspirational book “Life in Five Senses.” By tapping into the power of the senses, individuals can connect to the ordinary moments of life that they want to experience and remember.

(Gretchen Rubin is a happiness researcher and bestselling author of “The Happiness Project.” Her most recent book is “Life in Five Senses: How Exploring the Senses Got Me Out of My Head and Into the World.” She’s also host of the popular podcast, Happier with Gretchen Rubin, and founder of the award-winning Happier app.)