Relationship Experts Share The Non-Physical Traits Men Consider Ideal In A Partner

The physical traits of women that attract men are no mystery.

Research has shown that just as broad shoulders and a narrow waist attract most women to men, a hip-to-waist ratio that accentuates the “right” curves on a woman is irresistible to most men. Oh, and also breasts, lips, eyes, butt, legs, hair, complexion … the list of physically alluring features is vast. Every man has his own preferences, just as every woman has hers.

But what if we look past the surface? Looks might catch someone’s eye initially, but what keeps them around past that first blush of physical attraction?

What personality traits does a man look for in a woman who could become a potential romantic partner?

We asked a panel of YourTango Experts who have made a study of relationships in their careers to share the traits that men seek in a woman to create a deep, lasting connection.

Six relationship experts share the non-physical traits that men are attracted to in a woman:

  1. Encouraging and supportive

Encouragement. Men want not just approval, but someone who will have their back and make them feel that setbacks are not failures but a search for a new way forward. You can be cheerful and say, “You are smart. You will figure it out.”

– Jeff Saperstein, career coach

  1. Emotional intelligence and a sense of humor

Outside of physical traits and attractiveness, the top traits high-value men look for are the following based on actual input from my male clients: light-heartedness, curiosity, a focus on personal growth, and possessed of a high EQ (emotional intelligence).

A woman who can emotionally connect with a man, and understands and appreciates his feelings, ambitions, and insecurities is a top trait men look for. High emotional intelligence plays a big role in any relationship. It speaks volumes when a woman can stay aware of her emotions and the emotions of others, allowing for meaningful communication and connection without blow-ups and emotional outbursts.

– Carmelia Ray, celebrity matchmaker and online dating coach

  1. Warmth and confidence

Most men look for a woman who is comfortable with herself since this will likely help them feel comfortable in her presence. They like a woman who is warm, kind, and friendly with an upbeat personality because that makes them feel good. If he feels good when he’s with you, that is a great start!

– Ronnie Ann Ryan, dating and intuitive coach

  1. Accepting and non-judgmental

We are all aware that men are visually stimulated. But when it comes to finding a partner to settle down with, many men are looking for someone that they can be themselves around. I’m not talking about gross bodily functions, I mean they want to be free to express their real desires, hopes, and fears.

Someone that will allow them to express themselves without judgment or shame. Men crave respect and they want to know that their partner won’t lose respect for them when they see them at their most vulnerable.

– Taylor Kovar, CFP, CEO at the Money Couple

  1. Congeniality and a well-rounded life

As a matchmaker, the most common non-physical traits that my male clients seek in a partner are: easy to be with, happy with her life, and having interests that excite her.

  1. Honesty and level-headedness

A partner must not make up stories and live in a fantasy world but must live in reality — where actions never lie.

– Jack Kinney, founder and career coach

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