The traditional belief regarding marital satisfaction follows a U-shaped trajectory. It commences with an exhilarating romantic phase, then experiences a decline as individuals grapple with the reality that life with a partner is not always a steady ascent to happiness but can resemble more of an arduous journey. However, as time progresses, satisfaction often returns, either through acceptance of one’s circumstances or, ideally, through the negotiation of a more harmonious union.
Contrary to this conventional wisdom, the events of 2023 have challenged the notion that a long marriage is synonymous with a lasting one, particularly when it involves two high-profile and driven individuals. This year witnessed the surprising dissolution of well-established celebrity couples, previously held up as #couplesgoals, signaling a clearcutting in what was once considered the old-growth forest of enduring unions.
In September, Hugh Jackman and Deborra-lee Furness, a resilient icon of celebrity coupledom, announced their separation after 27 years. The shockwaves continued in October when Jada Pinkett Smith revealed in her memoir that she and Will Smith had been living apart for seven years, constituting a quarter of their marriage. Meryl Streep and her husband, sculptor Don Gummer, married for 45 years, disclosed that they had been leading separate lives for six years. Additionally, Kellyanne and George Conway decided to part ways after more than two decades, surprising many with the longevity of their union.
Leaving a spouse after a quarter-century might appear perplexing to some, akin to learning Chinese and then relocating to Mexico or meticulously ironing a stack of laundry only to throw it all back in the wash. To others, it may indicate a shift in affections. Notably, in these high-profile splits, there have been no public accusations of infidelity as the root cause, though such details are often kept private.
Various perspectives offer more mundane explanations for these late-stage divorces. In the absence of children to raise, there may be a lack of a joint project to engage in. After 25 years, spouses may find it challenging to surprise each other, with their stories, habits, and chewing noises growing thin. Divergent views on retirement, coupled with the myriad distractions in today’s world, from food-delivery apps to OnlyFans, contribute to the perception that the benefits of growing old together no longer outweigh the drawbacks.
Alternatively, these late-in-life separations can be viewed as a positive sign—a refusal to settle for the hand life has dealt, an insistence on seeking change even after decades of marriage. It signals a message to the cosmic order that one is not done yet, that there’s still room for transformation and new beginnings.
This theme of resilience and continued pursuit of dreams is echoed in the experiences of prominent figures in 2023. Madonna, at 65, is on tour, while Barbra Streisand (81) and Martha Stewart (82) grace glossy magazine covers, the latter flaunting a different kind of “rack.” Annette Bening, aged 65, stars in a biopic about Diana Nyad, who swam 110 miles at 64. Even in the realm of politics, the leading candidates for the next U.S. presidency are 77 and 81 years old. The success of “The Golden Bachelor,” depicting a widower’s quest for love in his 70s, underscores that the elderly are not fading away quietly but are defying the waning of their cultural influence and romantic aspirations.
However, it’s worth noting that this resilience is more evident among the affluent. Just as the past two decades have witnessed a growing income gap between those who choose to marry and those who don’t, late-life separations and the subsequent quest for senior love are endeavors typically undertaken by high-net-worth individuals. The discreet nature of these splits, involving separate but desirable residences, comes with a hefty price tag, requiring both partners to be financially secure enough to handle the bills without public disputes over assets.
The pursuit of new love, although a perennially captivating fantasy, can also be a daunting endeavor. Even for individuals like Gerry Turner, the golden bachelor, who have potential suitors delivered to their doorstep, finding a new mate is not without its challenges. Embracing a fresh start with someone whose flaws are already known may not lead to a springtime of new experiences, but there’s a certain allure to the prospect of a spectacular autumn.
As we navigate the changing landscape of celebrity unions, it may be prudent to extend positive thoughts to our favorite celebrity couples, particularly the more seasoned ones. How are Kyra Sedgwick and Kevin Bacon faring? Has anyone heard from Angela Bassett and Courtney B. Vance recently? Perhaps a Groupon for a date night for Rita Wilson and Tom Hanks would be a thoughtful gesture. In the unpredictable realm of celebrity relationships, 2023 serves as a reminder that caution is never unwarranted.
